the chicken series

2008-05-25T01:41:00.002+08:00

welcome to..
http://jollityjolly.livejournal.com

2008-03-02T23:34:00.002+08:00

i love scenery over architecture because..

scenery = by God

architecture = by Man

whose is more lovely? ;)

my stupid taskbar is screwed up, leaving me >:( at it. plus, because i don't know how to fix it.

2008-02-17T01:17:00.003+08:00

HELLO READERS! it's been a long time since i've posted, i know that full well. but here's to those who have been checking back and thank you very much. you have diligence, which i don't, to go online often.

reasons why i haven't been going online..
#1 laziness (truth be told)
#2 negative momentum. once you stop, it keeps going. man, this sounds somewhat paradoxical.
#3 Grey's Anatomy. haha, classic ;)

and so, i am still alive & kicking (if that didn't occur to you). doing fine :)

BUMP!

2008-01-11T16:35:00.000+08:00

i like this picture!

check out her big and blue eyes!

such a beautiful little kitten :)

poor her was found stranded on top of a tree yesterday, afraid to go down, of course. thankfully a kind soul called the SPCA and they eventually came and took her away. but now.. she's been adopted by us! i like her very much! and when she purs, i wonder if she's trying to communicate. hohum.

MY NEW PET! YIPPEE :D

2007-12-30T21:35:00.000+08:00

school's gonna re-open in approximately 2 days' time! that's fast. allow me to list out a few thanksgiving points!

#1 but of course, i thank God for God. for being the good God that He is, so that i am still here today. which brings me to my next point!
#2 i thank God that along the way this year 2007, i didn't choose to give up on God, neither did He for me. really glad because what would become of me if i were to leave from God's plans?

#3 thank God for a wonderful family in Crescent. although throughout the year, sometimes, things may have seemed bleak, God worked it out all good anyhow. so whatever we are facing now or are going to be faced with, i know God will bring us through again, always :)

#4 i thank God for restored friendships. or rather, hm.. like somehow some (or one) friendships were revived :)

#5 for a wonderful year of 2007 :)

actually, God is waaaaay toooo good that there are toooo many things to thank Him for so.. well, 2008 will be better!

i don't mind going to school and attending lessons. i just don't like it when i always doze off, BEYOND CONTROL. that's the whole point. it's not like i want yknow.. hopefully God can change this too? pretty please..

i have NOT finished writing all my CHRISTMAS cards! well.. since i missed the date way off, maybe i should change and write NEW YEAR cards instead, teeheehee!

i'm sorry, STEF. yknow yknow i still rmb you.. :)

2007-12-23T22:10:00.000+08:00

THIS IS MY 100th POST!

let me share with you something.. with credits to Little Louisa (haha don't ask why the 'little', it's just cos of literary alliteration i love to play with!)

busy making felix the cat says:

because in an easy life, there is little need for God and when i can balance everything myself i won't have a need for God because i think i can do it all

busy making felix the cat says:

an easy life is er..naturally easier to live but it is less exciting, less accomplishing, less satisfying, less than what i should be living

how very true! cool huh ;D

2007-12-21T00:14:00.000+08:00

i should never ever attempt to play Blind Mice again. played it today during cg and..

#1 half the time i was making a fool of myself

#2 i collided with another blind mouse and, bullseye! hit right smack on my nose :(

i think i'm quite bad a girl, but i cannot stop laughing myself silly when i come across young couples, teeheehee!

my progress in writing christmas cards is no progress at all, hohoho.

Santa, when are you coming to save me!

2007-12-16T12:00:00.000+08:00

Youth Christmas service yesterday! yes!

something funny to think about: was in a slight panic while trying to find a common link to talk with Cleo's brother about.

me: do you like music?

Cleo: he plays the drums..

he: but quit band already la. sian, plus the teacher very bad hahaha.

me (for whatever reason i thought about racist jokes =S): do you like racist jokes?

he: ya hahaha

and so that joke session was opened. thank God for jokes! hohoho. very bad, i know, but what to do? soccer's not my cuppa tea man.. good that he likes, easy to socialise with his new group then :D

had 4 converts yesterday! 2 P6 kiddos going to Fairfield (omg omg! why why why!??!) 2 from Crescent. wheee~

cannot wait for 22nd of December!!!! (but i'm waiting anyway)

2007-12-14T12:04:00.000+08:00

BACK FROM CAMP! it was.. i-don't-know-how-to-describe. maybe half the time i was almost like a living dead, but yet filled with amazement, at the same time also awestruck by the Power of God. indeed, God revived Crescent, again. everyone's all game for chiong-ing once again! really shocked at that response though (considering i didn't expect much at the end of camp). but maybe God wanted to prove me wrong, like how i say you should never underestimate the power of joanne lee. it has definitely gotta be God, need i say more?

i'm really surprised also by how efficient they can be. referring to: CLEO, CLARA LEE, JIAQI *claps* apparently, they've already begun to invite their friends down for christmas service the day after camp! feels like i haven't seen such a sight in a long time.. hooray for them! :D

i wanted to sleep for 24 hours after camp. but i failed to accomplish my life ambition after it was destroyed by a phone call.. boohoo! back to the bad sleeping habits again. i must change!

christmas is just more than a week away, hohoho! when is Santa coming? haven't written the thousands of cards that i have to, haven't completed all holiday assignments, haven't this and haven't that! bad sign. back to the lazy joanne? maybe. or maybe i have always been so, hoho.

i'm sleepy now, even though it's afternoon. but afternoon's are sleepy periods man.. zzZzzz -_-

2007-12-06T23:17:00.001+08:00

my tablet's down with stupid virus attack! this made me very :S and :(

but God loves joanne so much and doesn't want her tablet (PC) to die just like that!

after i took it to consultation with the doctor, called my sis and asked if she has an external hard disk to lend me to back-up my files. she didn't have one though, but offered to borrow one for me.

a few hours later, during the JC service, i received a message from her. apparently, she conveniently forgot about the borrowing thing when she went to school. however, her friend lent it to her for no rhyme or reason! how cool is that! AMAZING :O that made me very :D again and thus happily gave thanks to dear God!

hopefully no important files will be lost during this recovery process..

2007-12-04T21:31:00.000+08:00

sorry guys! haven't been updating because.. nothing much went on! but now, yes! does that explain why i'm here? :D

THANK GOD for His providence in my life! this time, i experienced it financially too, which is pretty abnormal. like last saturday, sacrificial young woman Yenli provided me with a lil bite during dinner, knowing my pockets were burnt. and the following day, funky old name twin Joanne Ang offered me money to have my card topped up! thank God and you guys! your goodwill is.. greatly appreciated, and will be returned :)

besides that, i've accomplished my mission of running 4km today! haha no great achievement, but still a leap of determination ;) thank God for His mighty strength :)

camp attendance is quite surprising too! wheee~ but still praying for more more more!!

WHAT'S MORE! today, i spotted a big golden opportunity for me to share God's good stuff with the Cedar girls. let me share with you this amazing story!

one fine day, my primary school classmates decided to hold a class gathering (note: those organisers were not my primary school good friends). however, i didn't go in the end due to.. the re-making of Sleeping Beauty, that is, i overslept! hee. to cut the long story not so short, earlier on i was chatting with her on MSN and was almost interrogating her about what happened. found out that we're able to talk quite a bit, and discovered her lil secret! (haha no secret, but something that i can work at). and it hit me only then that she and her 6 other friends (my classmates too) are in Cedar! i then realised that God is opening doors for the Cedar group this Christmas - i musn't let this golden opportunity slip away!!! goodness me!! haha yeah! so divine huh? just when Yenli and i were talking about our groups on saturday.. woohoo! GOD YOU ROCK :D (rhymes!)

okay, lest you complain of a long post (which, i think this is) i will run now! ;D

2007-11-29T08:36:00.000+08:00

yesterday was my last day of school for the holidays!!! rejoice! :D now it feels like proper holidays already :)

i don't really like November. it's a month full of birthdays after birthdays.. like unending celebrations of birthdays.

speaking of which, December's fighting its way here!! how fast and furious! i got christmas cards already, haha. didn't intend to actually, but got them anyway. i was making the list of people.. and stopped halfway eventually. because i realised that there were many to write to, and that's madness. how to!

and people, i have nothing much to update about eh. i have rare guests here! or maybe just silent readers that have decided to tag, hoho.

you know, i find people are the hardest books to read. many times we read them superficially, failing to comprehend them on a deeper level. or we could read them with a misunderstanding, and so form misassumptions of them. or otherwise.. whatever. (haha i don't know how to put across my thoughts)

for a moment yesterday, i thought that God would be the busiest person ever. what with so many people to handle; so many prayers to answer; so many requests to reply; so many problems to tackle. really a lot! so i really wonder why, sometimes, people complain of a busy schedule, lack of sufficient sleep, tiredness.. that the fact that God and someone else is busy being busy too! on hindsight.. does God even get to complain? or does He EVEN complain? haha maybe, to his angels. or maybe not, since he's God (rhymes! i've a natural in-borne talent for literature and poetry, ha!) i've always been afraid to poke poke busy people for help, nor bring up my requests upon them (but not all the time i have requests). i guess God's the only one i ever dare to poke endlessly and rant upon aimlessly.

oh yes! i recalled what i was pondering over yesterday! AMAZING. i was thinking about..

"thank God i.." VS "lucky i.."

i think i think i know why it shouldn't be "lucky i.." because if everything were planned by God, how can anything be coincidental?

and i think i also know why "thank God i.." if God had the capability of controlling everything, then he would be able to let the thing that happened to you, not happen. so that's why thank God?

2007-11-24T01:49:00.000+08:00

ALRIGHT! i'm back pretty quick huh? :D

i played a considerably good game with part of the media team today! was kinda apprehensive at first though. thinking, what if i witness the same kinda of situation again (how will i react!) but surprisingly, and not so surprisingly, the game turned out fun and funny. now see the difference? and with that, i am very satisfied with today!

another puzzling thing i've been pondering over is that - why is sports seen as something so.. amazing? that is, only if someone does well in it, of course. maybe the admirable thing about a sportsperson is seen obviously and easily. like in running, the faster the better! (they even provide you with information about the world's best records) or long jump, the further the better! so.. you can see with your eyes. and people tend to admire and cat-call for those who are better, and astonishing even. cos it's obvious, very obvious. but honestly, it is an ability that not everyone gets the privilege of having.

but what about arts and music? i really think that in order to know what is good or not about a piece of art or music, you would have to know how to appreciate it. cos firstly, these areas are pretty much subjective. and secondly, not everyone (Tom, Peter or John) would move into a deeper level of understanding to maybe, study about it. taking a photographic shot for example, just by looking at it, you may be able to say that it is beautiful. but how many can precisely point out how is it beautiful? definitely not those who do not read into photography. so you could say (or i want to say) that people who appreciate arts and music acsend up one level - understanding.

comparable to sports, anyone and everyone (Tom, Peter or John) knows what is good about a sportsperson. you know you know? what with the style, the attitude, the results.. quite duh right.

so.. yeah, really. i think i'm quite right again, haha. i THINK. I think.

my point being, why is it that some, if not most, people go "wow" very easily at superb sportsperson and not give two hoots about a photographer; or an artist; or a composer's work?

i'm voicing this out because.. it's just like, injustice, you know?

2007-11-22T19:35:00.000+08:00

DISCLAIMER: my anger has ceased and i'm speaking from a very objective point of view. i am just speaking out what i feel and am not imposing on anybody, anything. maybe my tone may seem angry, still, but nope, i'm not. neither am i good enough in english to score more than 90 marks for my english paper, so i cannot express myself directly but nicely. i think my being angry wasn't biblically correct, of course (for that i've already repented ok!) but i think my stand is justifiably right! if you identify with me, hooray!! but if not, you can always uh.. object. i'm open to all comments! ;)

i'm astonished to see how the ugly side of people is revealed simply through a ball game. it also got me upset (my upset contains anger with unhappiness, not just sadness) after observing how people can get so competitive because of a ball game (so are balls the cause? haha) it's RIDICULOUS! to me, at least. you tell me, if not for the prize, or the glory, or the honour, or the trophy maybe, who in the world would be fighting so hard? who would still take it so seriously anyway? yep, competitiveness could lead to achieving goals, and that's really good! but not so when honour and happiness is won at the expense of people's unhappiness, disappointment.. and more. it's a major boo-boo. for starters, why so rough! >:( take a chill pill man, it's just a game! how about you imagine with me, how much more fun can a game be if everyone were less competitive, less rough, less black-faced, less angry, less frustrated; and more joyful, more considerate, more encouraging? my point being, you win, you happy. but what about the other then? if everyone plays nicely, everyone's happy, isn't it?

ball games would not be fun anymore if competitiveness gets outta hand. then they cease to exist for a good cause already, no? just like us, people. when we were created, we were created for a good, good purpose. if we live otherwise, we cease to function the right way. i suppose i'm quite certain that ball games were never created for making people upset. okay no, i am VERY certain they were not created for so.

gosh.. actually, i would love to understand the heart of a person who plays to win. so i wouldn't speak from a selfish and biased point of view. but even so, i'm not totally wrong! yeah actually i've always been against competitiveness. could be a personality/character thing. but i don't see why and how it can be justifiable. objections?

i've played good games before. good games, to me, are those that i have not won, but have reaped a whole enjoyment and games in which you could laugh when you play.

and hello, i seriously don't see that incapable people (in games) are handicapped at all. YUP! i especially admire a perseverant spirit! three cheers to the perseverant!! *clap clap clap* cos at least they're friendly players :)

GOODNESS ME.. THIS IS SO ANNOYINGGGGGGGGGG.

okay take a chill pill man jo!

no sweat! ;)

alright! i'm happy already, haha! :D

2007-11-18T15:39:00.000+08:00

took a train home with Yenli yesterday and i was very surprised that we share the same sentiments! uh, at least a couple in common? so i'm not alone! hoho.

2007-11-08T21:10:00.000+08:00

it's only rightful, no?

try harder! there's no way that one fine day your efforts will not pay off, really.

lunch and floorball with central d tmr!

camp is approximately a month away, only.

for love of the people :)

2007-11-07T22:07:00.000+08:00

here i am! eh it wasn't my fault that i couldn't update a little earlier, blogger screwed me up! boohoo

almost two weeks of holidays have passed already, but still i don't see some holiday mood in myself, given my plight of being attached so closely to the school everyday. what extra lessons.. self-study.. homework and more homework -_- everytime i walk up that slope to school, i always wonder why i am right there.. when it's holidays! i've succumbed to my fate already, but it's pretty strange when people comment that they're forever seeing me in that yellow school uniform. like uh.. it's, school? oh well. but hey, look on the bright side! i've completed emath assignment! (to the best of my ability). still.. a great improvement! :D

and i'm picking up the habit of doing a sport/exercising everyday. but with regards to what happened on monday.. i didn't get to the stadium due to my retarded sense of direction :( was intending to walk to the stadium, but somehow i walked in the opposite direction and was actually heading home haha! retarded, really. so.. i made do with a brisk walk in the end, haha.

today, i went running (think i breathed in a whole lot of bad gases cos i was running by the road) - BAD. and floorball and basketball. my insight for today would be that somehow, you can tell a person's character by observing them play! uh.. yeah at least i was trying to. but it's not all impossible you see.

i caught The Phantom of the Opera yesterday! good show! just that.. a lil too sing-song for me. not that i didn't appreciate.. but i could hardly make out what the lyrics were, hee. anyway! literary senses brought me to evaluate, mentally, the movie. will update more of my impressions IF i feel like it, haha.

tmr's the day that i don't hafta to school, rejoice!! thanks to the hindu friends hahaha. would be a fruitful day i'm sure! :D

2007-10-21T00:35:00.000+08:00

was observing a cat clean herself up today, and i realised something pretty.. uh, disgusting =/ you know cats use their own tongue and mouth whatever to 'bathe', and God knows what lies in their fur! this shows that when they lick their fur, they could be consuming something really horrible. so as much as they are adorable (and i love cats a lot), they are still quite horrible little creatures..

i'm sorry to say that my dear cats :(

2007-10-18T19:51:00.000+08:00

running late one day, it suddenly occurred to me that the probability of having you being punctual, at any time of meeting, is just 1/1440. a minute too late and you're deemed as late; a minute too early, early. in other words, to be precisely punctual, you hafta set off at the exact right minute with much planning and calculation. this goes to show that being punctual is quite an achievement eh? i shall work at that ;)

my Physics teacher is a very sweet woman :)

i'm glad she'll still be teaching us next year!

i'm also really glad that i'll be able to move on to sec four next year!

and for the first time in my whole sec three life, I PASSED BIO!!! a major paper, that is. though not a fantastic passsing mark (beautifully on the dot, haha :D) BUT i passed anyhow!!! yay.

speaking of which, i recalled this story that wonderful weiting (just playing with alliteration only!) forwarded to me. couldn't recover it boohoo but anyway, it speaks of the blessings that one received. that they could be because of the prayers of others! so.. here's a big fat thank you to those who have been so nicely praying for me :) THANK YOU! really appreciate that :) and to those who haven't, you ought to repent hahaha!

2007-10-15T23:18:00.000+08:00

highlight of my day: WAM NIGHT :)

sure it was cool to be attending wam night not in school uniform (because on normal occasions i would have had school before which) somehow that perked me up a lot! all thanks to my lovely muslim friends who have hari raya hahaha :D

spent the afternoon in quite a slacky manner, BUT i also carried out my search for Nemo and i benefitted great bags from it!

but the whole point of my updating of this post: SPIRIT. positive spirit.. negative spirit.. God's spirit etc and all forms of spirit. my heart's cry for a thousand years long! man, how much more true can this be! the right spirit at the right time makes your whole life much more cheery! like you're in wonderland.. but the same is true anyway! yeah the teaching hit the nail precisely on the head! i cannot understand sometimes.. why people tend to have the negative spirit and that makes them all so.. downcast :( like that. c'mon! take that off and be a joyful young kid :D

2007-10-14T23:39:00.000+08:00

check this out, this is so cool man. joanne slept for 12 solid hours today hahaha! first in a long time and this feels great =/ speaking of which, i am reminded of this record that i wanted to hit and that is, having 24 hours of sleep, one day. :D say it's interesting, i think it is. anyhow, i will embark on it one fine day, really. sleeping more is self-loving; but okay, having excess is being sluggish. :(

what -_-

why complain so much? complaining makes your life go crazy.

jiaqi: yup yup, thank you very very much :) rmb? you earn a dog biscuit HAHA! and btw, your '(!!!)' feels so jessie hmmm

2007-10-13T21:59:00.000+08:00

THANKSGIVING

God has once again proven Himself cool and amazing during this period (i.e. during which i haven't updated any posts =/) many, many times. ever faithful providence in my life. for everytime i think i would zonk out, God would provide me with divine energy :) and etc etc. like today, it was even more, WOW o_O

and for the three new additions to the group, thank You very very much :)

this segment is in lieu with what i wanna add about! and that is.. *drum roll*

GOD'S WAY vs MY WAY

everytime we decide to do things God's way, everything will turn out fine at the end of the day and that's so cool man ;)

taking today for example,

financial blessings.. ah, whatever. it's pretty long a story and lazy joanne doesnt really wanna elaborate unless you may be interested to know, could always ask me. otherwise, just remember that God's so cool!

and MORE.

i don't like doing flag day. it's a dumbo thing that wah man, what can i say? i felt like some idiot with a extremely contagious disease that when everyone sees me, they would hurry off as fast as they could. what man!

God please don't let me have another round of it ya, just twice is enough to kill.

lastly,

SUPERHERO FINDING NEMO!

"'Come, follow me,'" Jesus said,

'and I will make you fishers of men.'"

-Matthew 4:19

with this, i conclude that winnie is such a liar. you liar liar pants on fire!

2007-09-09T15:57:00.000+08:00

if everyone else were to walk out on God, would you still carry on?

hmmm.. "God will make your 24 hours become 48 hours".. hoho.

that would probably be some psycho maniac workaholic idealogy (that intimidates).

gosh.

2007-09-09T13:37:00.000+08:00

i am very very sleepy now... *yawns* -_-

i'm all armed and ready! after i tie up the loose ends, having all tasks and miscellaneous issues settled, i will head off to the study battlefield >:]

printed topical checklist, revised study plan, set my mind... go!

and so from tmr onwards, while joanne is occupied with studying and school and all their best time buddies, please do not touch her (unless situation concerns life and death). haha, right. i don't wanna live in quarantine yet yknow..?

but feel free to ask me out for study dates! hee :D

for all else who are battling too.. don't give up, yet!

so long peeps! ;)

2007-09-09T01:04:00.000+08:00

God favours joanne lee.. :D she knows she's very loved by her dearest Friend, heehee :D

and my dearest Friend never ever shortchanges, i am so amazed! why..

lately i've been giving (short and impactful statement, hahaha). in terms of time, financially.. and my physical energy hahaha. and today i felt like i was Santa Claus, that i've finally cleared some of my "debts" which have been sitting on my table at home of, for some reason that i was lazy not to deliver them. anyhow, i have completed most of my quota for the day (yay!) other than some lil rascals who weren't present when i was around etc. well well. and due to my 'superb' memory too so.. hee.

oh btw as i was saying, i went home and to my astonishment, saw monetary input on my table :O! it's not a very small sum either (to me) so.. woohoo! God's da best :D really! i've hardly ever experienced such blessings in my life. so i am really thankful and believe all the more as i continue to give, God will love me back! hohoho :D

there are so many birthdays and events recently, my creative juices are depleting greatly.. hohoho :O

i think i've accomplished a considerable number of tasks today and so, i think today was a fuitful day! HEE :D

2007-09-07T23:24:00.000+08:00

here's a random text message conversation between Zifang and i:

zifang: Haha!i cant wait for exams to be overrrrrrrrr

me: i dont look forward for yours to be overrrrr.. HAHAHA. cos that spells the start of mine boohoo :(

yeah.. honestly, boohoo. i wanna run run run run away from this awful truth for the moment and live in happyland until i decide to come out of my candy house one fine day!

and here's another (not precise) text message conversation between a stranger i haha, kinda peeped out of boredom, and her ex-boyfriend (my superb observation and inference!) okay how about i describe instead. i knew she used a very.. hmmm interesting way of typing. like sorry = sowi (OMG!) and i am tired = i tire le.. HAHA okay okay don't be so mean jo, but that's not my point anyway. first what i saw was the guy (Eric aha) saying that he's bored and 'you wanna come over and pei me?' then the girl replied saying she's tired and slept for 5 hours for the past two days and so she wants to go home. then the guy said ok you go home and rest.. take care hor.. btw how long you dun have bf alrdy i got miss you so dun say i bad hor.. girl: 5 years already etc etc etc. until he said im at northpoint wait for u there k sth like that. and she said ok.

#1 puzzle: i thought she said she was tired and wants to go home?

#2 puzzle: going to meet him to come together again eh?

HAHA. funny bunny..

my hands are tired from floorball and arm wrestling with the clara-s. and yay, please crown me the strongest woman in town HA. headed off to nexus for video training (when i felt kinda sleepy and.. about to answer the call from my bed at home but..) anyhow, i benefitted from it and i was glad i went! because at least i learned something new heehee. and actually i think i'm quite a slow learner. which, i really thankful to my 'goooood' friend for always teaching me the same thing repeatedly before i can finally understand hurhur. yeah friend you get my drift la huh.

on random:

#1 i met jinqi today! and because of that, i thought of a simple but interesting game to play with people who go home together with me! it's a go-home-journey game hahaha.

#2 i captured some random pictures at the street soccer court!

#3 i played monkey!

#4 i thought of something coolio that could be used (for lights)!

#5 i met up with all my new sheepy this week! and got to know more more more about them which is, woohoo :D

#6 WOW

-i think imagination add colours to a statement :D

-no invention can outshine and overthrow God's ultimate creation of human beings, like you and i :D right, pal?

-sometimes i feel like stoning people. but then again, that's not what nice jo will do HAHAHA

2007-09-01T23:06:00.000+08:00

you know sometime this week during Bio lesson, we watched a clip on a bread-making process. (by the way, it's very cute! one by one, the blobs of flour travel through the machines etc.) eventually, the products were.. WHOA. i never knew bread came in such big bulks in the factories. it's a majestic sight (but seeing it personally would be a bonus!)

then creative juices of Joanne Lee sparked a thought in her that if only bread could come in more shapes and sizes (ordinary, plain bread, that is) that would definitely make eating bread a joy (actually not, since i love bread :D) rather, it would have caused bread to be more interesting and aesthetically fun, haha. bread-makers, do you buy my idea?!?

speaking of which, i also remember that another time during this week, Mum stole MY bread. the bread (not normal plain bread) which i brought all the way from Orchard to Woodlands, which i thought would taste good, which i was so looking forward to eating. and within two messages, she had the case closed.

Mum (1): can i eat your bread?

Mum (2): sorry i took your bread.

what!!! (i remember, again, that i used this same exclamation just yesterday. till now, i cannot believe i was so trusting that i believed a conspiracy! you set me up! dumbo jumbo finding nemo.. -.- CHEATERBUGS. ooo, i also used this recently, on my Chem teacher haha. cos she unintentionally had me run around just for her marker when memory loss struck her. long story)

my mum sent two consecutive messages, just like that! which means i was deprived of the chance to make my defense statement, to even try to protect my dear bread from being eaten :( i was so upset!

PS. i DO have a point to my (seemingly) silly story, ok! here goes.

today Winnie brought about a point that God's love jots down no records of MY sins. for a moment i found myself childish, for being upset (upset by the way, is not exactly being sad only. it's inclusive of a tad of mild anger) i reasoned out, and decided that i was actually happy and thankful for such a big-hearted God :)

like during worship, ironically, i was so overwhelmed by the joy of having such a great God that i couldn't stop grinning to myself hahaha. i hope you will too! ;)

here's a very mysterious concidence: i think i've an affinity with spiders. or rather, THEY have an affinity with ME (i don't fancy them ok). someday during this week, again, i had my third encounter, for the year, with a spider.

the first was the time i brought it from school to Woodlands library,

second was when it crawled (or hopped, they seem to hop) on and into my table,

and recently it crawled (or hopped, they seem to hop) ON MY LEG.

goodness. thank God my reaction wasn't too big at all. i cannot understand why do spiders keep coming to me.. :(

for the fourth time, sometime during the week, Huiwei and i thought we saw the same bird during our morning assembly. or maybe i thought. anyhow, that's not the point. the point is, we reacted the same way towards that bird. while singing (or maybe not so) the national anthem, looking up at the bird, we felt a sudden surge of happiness, freedom.. ok maybe not so precise a description of our feelings. hmmm.. relief? yeah, probably. it's so coincidental, yet interesting to have such a coincidence, ha.

on random, i wish people could be less superficial. i don't like them being so superficial. and people who stereotype too, omg. it's stupid. and i wish people could know that familiarity shouldn't breed contempt. need i say more..

lastly, i am so glad to have a friend that cares to understand me :)

oh oh oh, and i'm really happy to have received two really touching cards from my soon-to-be ex-SHEEP, and one from dear WINNIE (the pooh, hahaha sorry!)

I AM GOING TO WATCH THE SUNRISE ON THE 4th OF SEPTEMBER :D

2007-08-26T13:55:00.000+08:00

all i can say about yesterday is.. wow. and, SURPRISE! hur. hm.. at least relatively, a tad more happening.

thanks Gina :) that was nothing much la. but anyhow, yep, Crescent will indeed be more happening in the future, with the new changes :)

it's quite interesting to see how a drama cliche or just some random philisophy come true when things really come. they say you will never know how much you cherish it until you lose it. the same goes for a person. and sometimes you never get to say what you wanna say to someone until the person leaves, and you know you will regret it if you don't. oh well, maybe at times it really takes an unexpected twist to pick things outta you. so really, changes were meant for the better. if losing something will in turn, trade for something better, will you? at least i grew to embrace the fact better, i hope you will too! but this helped us to learn a lot more about people, right? *hint hint*

so sweet :)

2 surprises in a day and that makes things exciting.

and i learned a lot from meeting up with Lynette and co. yesterday. a bit lost still but.. i will learn! and "bring back this experience to bless others". i realised (or maybe my own assumption) that the adults media work pretty differently. certain things that i don't understand.. but.

and and and actually i've lots more things to say, but i don't feel like (or am lazy to haha) so there you go!

GO JOANNE LEE!

2007-08-21T19:53:00.000+08:00

yay :D i feel so much lightened now hahaha. i'd rather study at leisure, than being tied down by a timing. and after we were dismissed from school, i did not go out, neither did i go home (though i intended to, haha, sleep :D) instead, i went to xxx secondary school with Hazel to evax. it was a rather impromptu decision. but i thought it'll be interesting to see how pioneering a school, evaxing etc is like. and so.. there we were!

firstly, God was really kind to us by turning the scorching sun down, and bringing in great winds :) i observed that different schools have different cultures, really. haha and one peculiar but interesting sight was to see that certain groups of them loved to hang around the ice-cream man just outside their school gate, but they were not talking to the ice-cream man! probably trying to lend his shade under the umbrella hahah :p i also got to see people of different behaviour (oh no i feel like i've been in jail and haven't been socialising in tens of years =/) i realised that going to a school to evax and the evax around streets or shopping centres is pretty different too. like, we have to wait and wait for students to walk out. unlike on the streets, there are tons of people to speak with and you walk around hunting them down (which is, kinda stressful on our legs ha). anyhow, we managed to get the number of contacts intended (i do pray that they will be at the very least, interested to come for once).

due to various reasons, we did not approach a certain group of people. as i saw them walk away.. i felt very sorry for them :( because of who they appear to be.. they are kinda disregarded (in general, not just in evax) which is really a sad story. perhaps sometime when i decide to move on to doing something radical, we'll probably work to bringing such people to Christ. to me, these are the people who needs God's love all the more. maybe no one believes in them, that is why they are like that. maybe in their hearts there is something tying them down etc.. yeah in the future, we'll see how God leads :) but i wouldn't mind really. ha i even imagined myself to be called to outreach to such people.. i visualised myself dressing myself up like them, talking like them, behaving like them etc. so one fine day i can earn their trust. HAHA :p

taking a step back and looking at people, really reminded me of how much people need God. and probably in everyone's hearts, there is a template impression of how a religion is, or their own beliefs and stand. if we could understand them, that'll be much better :)

2007-08-18T22:42:00.000+08:00

GOODNESS! i'm so thankful to have found a friend who actually appreciates and enjoys the scenery and the night view and the sunrise and the beach and all the beautiful things in the world, just as much as i do :) she saw a shooting star during a chalet!!! i wanna see tooooooooooooooooo omg! :O i will pray for a meteor rain or a shooting star or maybe.. a planet to show itself to me. ZIFANG!! i cannot wait for our date at the Esplanade! just the river, night view, comfy couches, great music and the soothing breeze.. :O!!! after 7 November yeah!

or i could study my guts out to attain extremely superb results for Geography, and then some kind soul from wherever would offer me a sponsorship to go to Italy or whatsoever place the school's planning for this year. i will gladly receive it and hit the country! i REALLY wanna see all the beautiful scenery of every part of the world. to capture it with my very eyes and memory, then with the camera hahaha.

omg omg omg.. God is really the best artist ever. His creation, the physical landscape, is just simply.. ineffable. even in the sleepy mornings when i'm in the sleepy state, just a look at the pretty morning sunrise sky can perk me up better than any coffee or tea. amazing!

I WANNA TRAVEL THE WORLD!

today was pretty much an eventful day (feels beyond the usual, somehow). firstly there was PCLM and i have decided to accept the challenge, big time. two weeks, two weeks.. passion and conviction escalate!

then i headed off meet zifang for a while and to pick up (pig) friends up, ahahahaha. was a tad apprehensive actually, for some reason. but anyhow, i met them and talked to them a lil on the way. guess the whole service was not at all how they picture it to be (i asked them what did they picture ahahaha). surprisingly but not so surprisingly, the way they picture a church to be is precisely what i thought it to be too hahaha. joke. oh yeah made it on time for service woohoo! they liked the songs and hahah etc.

alright now how about let's apply what we've learned during sermon. i thank God for a new convert! am really encouraged by myself (hur) no la i mean it's encouraging to see someone receiving God into her life right? and and and ya..!

after service old plus new Crescent celebrated Hannah's birthday on the pretence of a Crescent reunion and apparently Hannah took my word for it! ;D really glad to see the old sec fours again heehee and speak with them :)

recently i've booked a couple of dates to motivate myself haha but man. this year will be over in a jiffy and there are many exciting events to look forward to!

met up with a couple of my sheep during the week and i'm glad i gave the time. because God didn't shortchange me and and.. sheep you two know what la huh! :D

GREAT! :D

teachings and sermons were pretty practical lately and i think that's good still. for starters, having good spiritual habits (although you may start off as doing a chore or requirement) but soon you may find that it eventually develops into an enjoyment and great feeling. because it's quite impossible for anyone to not discover anything no revelation no nothing, unless you may be alien. kickstart with thinking it's a chore and i wouldn't think that's a bad idea at all. cos i'm sure of how God will use that time to do something :)

it's just like.. now going for service has become a part of my life. and it feels weird if only i do not go one day. oh but my point being, i'm enjoying everyday with God :)

but i'm depressed :(

MISSING REPORT #2: ANOTHER OF JOANNE LEE'S NOTEBOOK IS LOST.

why must this be so?!?!? God don't do this to me!!! :'(

i remember the first one i lost was in Meridien, when i left it on the table. this time, i think i left it in the MM room. amazingly, it can go missing. man man man! there are valuable teachings and sermons in them and omg this time i've even included random issues that (i dont wanna brainstorm for them again)!!! i remember vividly going around Meridien with Stef searching for it and asking even the cleaners (in chinese) and praying really hard for it and and and.. but in the end it wasn't found. God, i still wonder why. BUT I REALLY DON'T WANNA LOSE ANOTHER ONE!!! the more i think of the contents the more $#@#$% this feeling is overwhelming and crazy and madness! whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. my dear precious notebooks.. please come back back back back backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk :( you know you mean a lot to me..

2007-08-12T15:09:00.000+08:00

good afternoon everyone! actually i was pretty lazy to update (hurhur) but due to the overwhelming response of my fans, i decided to (hahaha). nah.. yknow i'm just kidding :p

how about let's start with a joke i enjoy!

Heehee and Haha were two good friends.

one ~~fine~~ bad day, Haha died.

so Heehee went to the funeral and said "Haha, he died."

get the joke, get the joke!?

okay anyway here's good news i brought from the past couple of weeks (or so):

Joanne is growing and learning a lot a lot! and and and.. yup yup! ;D good job!

SEPTEMBER HOLIDAYS ARE APPROACHING!! because time flies and will fly past soon, no worries! i'm very excited :)

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.. :)

2007-08-05T22:35:00.000+08:00

BREAKTHROUGH! i actually did HOUSEWORK today hahaha! even now as i'm typing this, i still feel this urge to want to open up the drawer and check out my beautiful 'art piece', after an hour and more of hard core work (haha no la i'm just exaggerating). what's alarming is that i enjoyed doing it!

i started off when i kinda got bored of doing work and so decided to head for the kitchen with no intention of cleaning anything at all. i was looking at the kitchen table and figured out that it was in quite an ugly mess, and so decided to tidy it up. soon after, i reached into the drawer for a cloth and realised that i didn't like the way things are put in there too. and since i was at it, i though i'd might as well just tidy up the drawer with all the utensils too. there you go, my drawers and table are now a clean and neat sight (you could go to my kitchen for sight-seeing! aha just joking.. chill la)

and the moral of the story is, even though i took a break off work, i did not exactly waste my time away. and wah, i'm so proud of myself :D i hope it stays like that forever hahaha.

2007-08-02T21:17:00.000+08:00

i want to make the most out of every hour i spend because time flies, and is flying really quickly nowadays. but i don't quite like having to decide between two things. HOW!

i wonder why is the leader of ants is called a queen, and not a king.

2007-07-30T22:00:00.000+08:00

30th July is one special little day :)

and first of all, it started off at midnight when i was pleasantly surprised by Stef. eh i was really shocked you still remember, because as i was too engrossed (hardworking hahaha) in doing my work, i actually forgot about it myself. until your message came in, that is. i was surprised also because we haven't been talking in aeons. big fat thank you for you pal! ;D

then i went right away into my room to spend time with God. as i reminisced the occurrences ever since i entered Y-Hope, God's love overflowed within me.. i was so so touched. indeed, many things have taken place, good and bad, but i find it really interesting to recall about the past. oh why the nostalgia?

i had a good laugh at jokes in school too! and had an argumentative essay written (i didn't really like the topic though). then crisis happened. mr oh-so-fast began his race. and he was so fast he won the top position in the 100m nose race -.- but even though i was not quite up to snuff, i headed for training (pretty happily). to my delight, training was just games ahahaha! you bet how happy i was (though it wasn't that appealing a game). and how about some more coloured icing toppings? trainings are now reduced to only once a week! MONDAYS! goodness, you can bet again how elated i was to hear such a great news upon returning. my instant reaction was a "YES!" er.. quite loudly :p therefore i need not worry about time crisis anymore yippee!
aha, God never shortchanges eh?
and and and... friend #1 said she will most probably be coming for service this saturday together with friend #2 woohoo! good job ;)

after training i tried to rush off but was stopped but Jieying for a lil talk. it wasn't time wasted at all because i got to hear about what she did with God (haha doesn't sound quite right) and what she plans to do about her friends etc. how encouraging! to know that she's grown, really. soon after, i hurried off to home sweet home :o

that's all for today. it has been a great July!

2007-07-29T21:50:00.000+08:00

i think i'm beginning to better appreciate people's efforts by a little observation. aye long story but i needa make this a chop chop one before i run!

anyhow, i wanna welcome our new additions to the caregroup!! (although you mayn't read this but..)

Charmaine,

Small Clara,

Jessica,

Big Leyi,

Small Leyi,

Megan,

Narmatha,

Samantha!!

there you go. yay! :D

God, thank You for blessing us with these new peeps :)

2007-07-23T20:23:00.000+08:00

my dear trees: i think i almost hear your cries of pain and desperation.. if you know my heart for you, you'd probably be able to see the effort i put in in trying to save and spare you guys from all the painful sawing and cutting (if you even have nerves, that is).

hello animals: i don't want you to die for no apparent reason either, other than to satify human's insatiable appetite. i can't identify with you how dying is like, but know that i feel sorry for you k? and i'm trying to finish my food everytime i eat too :(

mr farmers of the world: i am making your effort pay off well and honestly, i enjoy and love eating the rice you harvest. but sometimes, sadly, people just don't cherish every single grain of rice that's sitting on their plate. i hope you know i do, very much.

oh water.. you will eventually still remain as water, won't you? you will probably just serve in a different purpose.

i do NOT like wasting food.

so, STOP WASTING FOOD AND RESOURCES!

why? why can't you see that food is extremely precious to everyone, including yourself? :(

2007-07-19T20:39:00.000+08:00

thankfully, school has been pretty (or very) fun and laughter filled. why? that's cos during our free periods we maxmised the time on playing seemingly intellectual games (which turned out to be typically silly billy games) -.- and they DROVE ME MAD, close to becoming a literal reality. i racked my brain juices thinking of the answers, but those were futile attempts that killed a considerable number of my poor, suffering brain cells. i spent three whole days, and was told of the answer very obviously, but it was such a slight factor which i overlooked, badly. nonetheless, i had a great time playing with my new neighbours ever since i shifted over to join them ;)

i have been really sleepy too, which is, a bad bad sign actually. today, i actually feel asleep unconsciously whilst playing games, haha. blame it on the overwhelming sleepiness that even the bare table became utmost inviting. however, Bio's becoming the highlight of my interest in studies. i was unusually perked up during today's lesson, even amidst the immense weariness of everyone else in class. for that, i think i deserve a pat on my back. good job, joanne!

and and and, i've embarked on a storybook, an achievement of me so praiseworthy in ages :) started on Tuesday, and i'm halfway into the book (to be honest, the book isn't very thick actually). but still, i think i deserve thumbs up for my faithfulness in reading it. considering reading was, to me, the most detestable chore to carry out.

therefore, i will proudly conclude that school has been relatively better this week, and i'm really glad :D other than a little scratches along the way, that is. not bad! ;)

2007-07-15T23:29:00.000+08:00

i think Crescent's leadership hierarchy is seriously a little imbalanced; when one takes up a major role, she is offered and assumes most of the other roles as well. well, maybe the minority are caught this situation (well duh! the minority are leaders what hahaha what am i saying), that is. as such, they seem to be perpetually mentally and physically burnt out, like they are.. being oppressed (which seems to be the case). busy-ness is like they're shadow. they being leaders, are expected of A LOT. needless to say, the biggest area is of course their studies. and in this school, studies speak of more stress and worry.

then there are people (of the majority) who get to disengage themselves from the killing leadership roles, and enjoy a tad more. considering they have a lot less to commit to, and hence a considerable more amount of time to manage with. they are, nevertheless, still expected of by the monsters of an insatiable expectations for more excellence.

however and unfortunately, CCA plays a major part in topping up to the ultimate purpose in school (not always the case). and CCAs here are extremes - the hot and passionate (mostly sports CCAs) are forever restricted from more leisure as mostly are down for trainings at least two days per week, some three. to make matters worse, a couple of CCAs even ask for everyday, which is seriously insane.

out of the 3 groups mentioned, i am so thankful i may consider myself in the second. still sane and sound to allow my brain to process and then the nerve cells to transmit sensible messages to work out sensible actions and decisions. you could say i'm slothful, but i would insist i'm just not as fatuous. probably being more inclined in situational Math (as i would name it), to calculate the limitations of a time span of 24 hours a day, and a feeble mind that could cause one to commit feeble-minded things.

sometimes, now most of the time, the three group of people could cause an unending distortion to the way other things are planned. therefore, these are precisely the factors which cause me great distress in working out a way to have everyone meet up, for crying out loud. strewth! it is all the more frustrating when you find yourself in a state of helplessness in trying to change any of the above. because those would be.. personal decisions made that are cut and dried. besides, they are almost irrefutable commitments (aren't they?). gah. don't make me detest! but i must keep my composure.

then, i figured God will make a way :)

yesterday itself was a joke to laugh for. it was surprising how God can indeed develop Huiwei and my fatigue to fun and laughter through a meal: God answered my grace!

it all started with a meal, and the leftover disposables of our meal, which finally became toys. and the poor table, eventually becoming a part of our play in reliving our childhood escapade. hahaha my goodness!

i discovered today, that my cousins could sing all four languages of the "Happy Birthday" song! how interesting. heh to think i thought i was good enough to be able to speak all four languages of the MRT announcement.. but they challenged me through the song! and and and so, i wanna go learn from my friends tmr hahaha!

2007-07-08T00:38:00.000+08:00

literal time crisis!

monday - oral

tuesday - mock exams

wednesday - oral

thursday - not me unfree

friday - hello my dear cg, please say you're free.

i don't like it when my after school time is robbed off by such things. although for the good of our studies, i know.. at least don't steal my more popular days away (tuesdays especially) you time thief! but now it's completely stolen away by ~~dumbo jumbo~~ mock exams which end ten years laterrr.. -.- for not just only one week, but a thousand weeks! grr.. kill the time thief!

God please HELP multiply my time someway, somehow.

but woohoo! we're gonna hit the headlines in heaven!

hahaha i am reminded of something suddenly. i rmb Daniel always using the 'slipping on banana skin' analogy, in the past.. now i'll say we'll slide through the durian shell! ha, up to your own creavity to imagine and depict.

i thought about 'One Way' today and it was sung during P&W!

i thought about Holy Spirit baptism during service and during Central prayer meet we did so!

ha okay. those were just the random coincidence, or nicely put, divinity, that occurred today..

and yay.. :) so many things to rejoice and be glad over!

good job!

(hahaha er.. thank you Gina and Melody for being so supportive hurhur.. want my autograph? HA)

2007-07-02T22:31:00.000+08:00

i am so pleasantly surprised, encouraged and awed by what is happening to the people in the group now :) postively, of course.

i am pleasantly surprised by a simple message of remembrance left on my tagboard,

i am so encouraged by the people's growth and hunger for more,

i am awed (perpetually) by how one grows,

i am assured that the fruits to come will be as such,

i am so thankful,

i am so excited,

i am so geared up and ready to go for it,

i am i am i am so everything.

i am so game.

let's pick up the momentum, catch the rhythm, and here we go. Amen, Crescent?

thank you, Zifang :)

and Janeen

and Grace Lee

and everyone else in the group (though you may not read this.. but, well well)

MOONBLOW, hahaha!

i know WHY again :)

a lil glimpse of my dream caregroup shown today in Central D event :)

lethargy from floorball today speaks of the need to exercise more =/

BREAKTHROUGH! i stroked Skippy's soft and white body today woohoo!! 3 cheers for Joanne Lee!!! PLUS, i talked to her yeah!! :D

YES!

Thumbs up! ;)

2007-06-27T22:21:00.000+08:00

fast, fast, fast!

everything is and is going to be FAST. why?

and homework's piling like rubbish at the incinerators.. burn them! why?

oh but school's not bad at all, considering there are really good news! like, breaking away from the china scholars in chinese lessons! say 'yay' and 'goodbye'. and something else, which i cannot remember.

oral's making its way here real soon.. gah.

eventually, we will :)

2007-06-22T12:24:00.000+08:00

You are why I sing

You are why I live

Everything of me

I place at Your Feet

You are why I love

You are why I give

Everything of me belongs to You

not so of the fact that i thought.

i enjoyed yesterday's caregroup (not that i've never). but somehow.. probably an inward working that's different. as i was preparing for worship, the statement 'when was the last time' struck me like lightning. hm..

when was the last time you teared for a friend not receiving salvation?

when was the last time you've found yourself turning mad for Jesus?

when was the last time you've cried were disappointed over rejections?

when was the last time you've felt your conviction fanning into passion?

when was the last time you slogged your heart out?

when was the last time of many things. when?

it's hard to determine precisely when, of course. but was that just last month, yesterday, a minute or a second ago? or what's more, last year.

and as i was talking to Jessie yesterday, i realised that as times changed, many things have changed, if you start recalling from the past. people moved on, groups shuffled, people come in.. etc. but i guess what matters and will not changeis what lies inside; that cannot (and should not) be wavered by circumstances or changes.

the idea of sleeping for 24 hours is enticing. i think i may turn into a literal Sleeping Beauty soon (okay okay, i hear the resounding objections already. not BEAUTY). Sleeping.. Giant then.

what in the world has happened to me? :( technically, i should not be so lethargic, considering the amount of things i do nowadays. it's strange =/

school's re-opening in 3 days. i'm apprehensive, yet excited.

God!

2007-06-20T18:40:00.000+08:00

sometimes i think sleeping is one of the conventional and easiest ways to conform to become a lazy daisy and not do anything.

*correction: not doing anything as in.. resting. resting from thoughts and tasks etc.

but ironically, sleeping excessively can be a waste of time as well. considering during the period of sleep, the most you do is breathe and dream (of silly things) which, are not the most productive things you can do with your time. that explains why i conclude sleeping is not exactly one of the best uses of time.

and so, to maximise the use of time, i hafta shave off my sleeping time? as much as i would love NOT to, if that's what it takes to give more..

Gina, with the application of inferential skills, does this post answer your question and have cleared your doubts yet?

Sweet, like honey :)

I'M STILL CHINESE, MIND YOU.

*Disclaimer: this is with absolutely NO intention of being prejudiced, at all.

"Let's strive hard together with Crescent, with what we have in our hands; when we don't have, God will provide."

Amen :)

yesterday i witnessed an incident (worse, a crime) that irked me very much >:(

it's hard (and crazy) to love such people.. how can i ever?

and i'm sorry i didn't do anything about it; i was too scared and cowardice, i know.

if i were more courageous and less timid then, i could have changed the outcome, and helped someone helpless..

was i helpless myself? nope, maybe not.

i dreamt of this verse yesterday night..

"So I commanded that all the wise men of Babylon be brought before me to interpret the dream for me."

-Daniel 4:6

i wondey why. one of the silly dreams again?

2007-06-17T23:59:00.000+08:00

those were the days..
recollection of the past were both good and bad
19, give and take, within a year and a half, is not a lot at all actually
whatever happened to everything; i want them back
i feel like, i want to
no more Rudolph (or however you spell that joker's name) the ~~red~~ black nose reindeer
make the future more interesting then

ok, not news worthy at all.

2007-06-16T23:42:00.000+08:00

i read blogs and here and there all i read is about church camp -.- fine.. i will fill in details about MY camp as well.

hm.. of course, i wouldn't exactly say i haven't totally enjoyed myself at all, because i did. and i don't know how to precisely define what were my learning points because it was mostly learned through experiences, rather than filled with and being taught theoretically (which is, quite new to me, but not yet adjustable somehow. still hafta think and figure out myself). but i have learned things practical and suitable enough to apply in the KOG as well. which goes to show, i haven't totally wasted my 5 days there. aha! so i came back with a burnt face and dark hands (only), and peeling-like-crazy face :( really dislike this tan though.. because my hands are dark but legs not due to protection from the long pants (which was worn due to verbal force). PLUS, i made new friends! *thumbs up!*

on random:

#1 i THINK i overcame my fear of heights

#2 i enjoy kayaking :p

#3 i was awoke in surprise of my own sleeptalk (about kayaking some more) =/

#4 i am more immune towards dirt and insects

obviously, who says i am still over the fact i couldn't go for church camp? have yet to discover what's God's plan for me this time. but again, who says i need a camp for growth? can always pin ming grow myself to payback for the loss. IT'S HOLY DISCONTENTMENT.

speaking of which, Ang and Daniel, you provoke me with xxx and we'll show you what God can do through Crescent!

Weiting, thanks for being relatively more detailed in sharing with me about camp :)

the rest were being lazy daisies.. -.-

Jessie, i'm so glad you grew so much, and are still growing. yep, you sure can make a difference in the group. whoever said you have to be a careleader to cause anything! haha aye, next time i'll just throw you to camp again and let you discover everything yourself. so interesting to see who you turn to in times of emergency (confiding) when i'm not there! :p not wasted humility at all to ask your mum for permission again eh?

Clara, seems random but i just felt like saying, i'll trust you :)

2007-06-08T00:07:00.000+08:00

alright good job! at least Mr Lion is mostly completed already :D just a lil more touch up and strings attached, he'll be charged up and all ready to go!! ha, it's the sense of satisfaction you get with looking at the birth of your lil creation that makes you really.. happy.

anyway anyway anyway.. from yesterday's incident i seriously conclude that i have a poor sense of direction. or maybe, just lousy directional pictorial skills (if that's what it's called). and so with that, i began my day with a whole screwed up start. with meeting Lou at the different McDonald's (ha, how stupid can we be).. to taking the longer way to go to the Mac's she was at (cos i forgot ok!) etc etc etc. you picture the rest yourself (it's a long long story you won't bother to read. much less my typing =/) AT LEAST, i found my way to Arab Street :)

however! God ended my day with a big smile on my face :D (any bigger can't be expressed here!) it is nice to know the efforts you have put in were appreciated. or what made me happier was knowing that on the whole, everyone benefits from it! mhm.. yup yup. thank you :)

joyful, but unhappy.

2007-06-06T00:14:00.000+08:00

part of the Africa business is settled. good?? yep. however, not the major issue yet. which, will be covered later on.

joke of the day/lesson learnt for the day: our waist measurement is measured in INCHES, not CENTIMETRES!

can't believe Huiwei and i actually made the same silly mistake! =/ 50 x 150 cm.. to think i even said "ok let's take the max 30cm for each person, already more than enough! then cut into half, so one roll's enough for all of them! right??" yeah, right -.- it turned out by not knowing that things are measured in inches, you have to multiply them instead, so that leaves us with LESS than enough for all of them. how stupid.. oh well. at least it's a new revelation :)

alright tiring. thank you Weiting for praying for me :)

and the 2 kids whom i suppose will pray (if they do not forget) thanksssss

joannelee will pull through this week! victoriously :D

2007-06-04T22:37:00.000+08:00

Have a break, have a KitKat.

it is that difficult to find a 'best fit day' (as i put it) for everyone to meet up.

i want a catching up too.. but time won't allow so eh, good friend?

i will leave everything to the last week of this holidays (like this is not one).

just let me live in slumberland.. :O

learnt something during shepherding with my sheep today - how to make my way (correctly) to her house :) not a bad time spent at all. plus i received a lil gift (that will certainly top my body up with a thousand and one more calories..) =/

animals and tribal people, it is you all i will dress up nice and well.

just let me do this well, and i can leave for ~~stupid~~ OBS without worries.

Welcome Jiaqi, to this.. great place to be in :)

jessie you know what to do!? yeah i know you do.. redundant, ha.

CRESCENT, we'll go for more and more of yellow shirt GIRLS this time!

melody and gina, you two jokers are so cartoon, kids will love you if ever you appear on their favourite channel!

2007-05-29T20:24:00.000+08:00

what an unexpected ending after all these while.. of praying, worrying, fidgeting & squirming, tearing, tearing hair.. a harrowing experience indeed. guess sometimes, if not most of the time (but definitely not always), results really do not work out in accordance with the effort or time or emotional highs & lows invested.

what's delight-able is that i know that i've really tried. and at least now i know it is an absolute answer, even though unfavourable. which is still, better off than left hanging there in uncertainty and doubt.

what's not, 'the-worst-that-could-happen-is-a-no' isn't all that acceptable actually.

so what's next? do all i can and am required of before it, lor. anything beyond that? i don't know.

probably there will be no shortchanging in the end. for all i know, maybe this will be traded for something better. probably souls for the Kingdom, who knows. that wouldn't be too bad a trade i believe. i, for one, will not let this what-seemed-worthless trade business go to waste. why, of course i will not lose out. not that i will even let myself lose out anyway. otherwise, shoot me.

i was just wondering, who determines best anyway? best is.. you work until you finally collapse and.. move on to meet God? or when you have nothing more else to do? which is, quite impossible. so where is that 'best' that one can go? there's limitless amount of issues, things etc.. but there's a limit to us right? hm..

present to you guys a big fat thank you (i realised it's singular 'thank you' that i typed. so too bad, you hafta share, ha)

Daniel, for making 2 ~~wasted~~ trips down. and for helping to speak when i was.. lost for words. it was more assuring to know you're there to lend a great helping hand!

Huiwei, so our hopes were dashed in the end eh? i want to affirm you for making the wiser decision in the end.. as much as you loved to and were eager to go for OBS. dear friend, i know you'll always make sound Kingdom-minded decisions after all :) yep, let's believe for what's good in store for us in OBS.

Winnie, for your sweet encouragement.. thank you :)

2007-05-29T20:05:00.000+08:00

CENTRAL C!

Central C, a unit famous of our proclamation of I LOVE JC! However, we are not a JC group and thus the 'JC' does NOT refer to us declaring the love for our schools as JCs, but our love for Jesus Christ! Crescent, STC, plus our faithful pioneer group, planting seeds in Bukit Merah Secondary School, Henderson, Queenstown, Queensway, Gan Eng Seng, Outram and Balestier Hill, are the precious ingredients of this very all-girls unit (by far)! Ultimately, we are led by dear Elise Eva Chan Yi-Hua :)
But of course, Central C is closely knitted together by our very benchmark vision of hitting 55 people, ASAP! I guess being an all-girls unit is one factor that gels us together all the more. Although we may not be the only all-girls unit, certain characters of violence and masculine-like behaviour may cause us to differ from the other. Sometimes, seed meetings were delayed all thanks to the Little Miss Chatterbox-es in the team. Nah, the time used for side-tracking and random jokes did not go to waste at all. Because we enjoy one another's silly billy actions, jokes and whatnot. Look here's application of side-tracking =/ Interesting analogy we have: The CLs are called to be pillars and Elise, the 'level one' roof, who in turn in supporting Daniel, and the list goes on.. And then again, God made us all different so, nevertheless, there will still be the group of which who are sane and the intended kind of people God created women to be! Central C have and are friendly people, hence forming allies with Central B to birth a musically-talented band, Anagram! The noble band who done Central proud during the ExCube Battle of the Bands (as, anyhow, named by yours sincerely)!
Central C.. is a unit of a warmth and loving environment, where a handful may grow up in all through their high school life, and leave with memorable experiences, loving memories and sweet reminiscences.. you name it, we have it. It is also where one finds good pals despite being of different schools or age.. Like any other unit, Central C is definitely not deprived of the fun, laughter, peace and joy of one another's company! Yep, I love and enjoy very much, being part of Central C, serving together with this wonderful bunch of people. Ultimate point being, be it individually or as a whole body, we will rest no case until Jesus comes back again! Right? :)

2007-05-24T18:29:00.000+08:00

RAH. this anxiety and uncertainty is killing me..!

Ang, you shouldn't have..

tmr's gonna be an eventful day. and when i imagine what could/is going to happen, i feel all the creepy crawlies in the world, in my tummy. churning & churning... =/

maybe i sleepwalk at night. i feel the pain of an inconspicuous bruise-like 'thing' that's unaccounted for at the left of my forehead. and i.. have no idea how on earth it made its way there, seriously. rack my brains and i cannot think of a logical cause for it. hmm..

thank you, Angela, for letting me rant & vent, moan & groan and.. yep.

what's eating when everything delicious is now tasteless.

yeah, i did it! in a more.. composed fashion, at least :)

What does marriage mean to you? ha.

i learnt many new words today :)

2007-05-18T20:31:00.000+08:00

wow. i don't know if this means anything but my dad just said to me, "just do your best, and let God do the rest". ha okay, that's cos i was speaking with him about my results and whatnot (my future). i assured him.. it's not that i don't know my thing, and i hope he got my drift.

i didn't want to go for training today (haha seems random, but you'll know why). when initially, i was NOT reluctant at all about going. ok i admit, that was after my stand was a lil shaken by xxx ('s not your fault!) but somehow in the end, i decided to go since i was all dressed up already.

and i glad i went :) because it was.. quite productive i guess. though not so considering it's been a long time since i've last ran properly =/ but i'm even more so because i made a new friend :) and she lives at Khatib, which is relatively near my home. and so, i have made up my mind that i will go for training faithfully, and everytime so, i will ask her to go home with me!

thank You God, for always not shortchanging me :)

i thank God everytime i'm on the wrong track, He always sends along my friend(s) to bring and lead me back (literally, but not so). my class shifted ourselves and things to the spare classroom on the second level of the opposite block and settled in. honestly, i'm pretty pleased with the new classroom :) no more desert-like conditions anymore, but it's getting so cold and windy that my papers etc are flying everywhere.. comfortable as i was, the next day i actually forgot we shifted classrooms. as such, my legs carried me on the routine looooong journey up the winding stairs (or rather, circular stairs.. is it winding?) i was walking slowly and suddenly Narmatha called me. "Joanne! where are you going?" i turned and looked at her for a moment, wondering if it's like there's no school or something. i thought for awhile, before it occurred to me we're now on the second level. and then she went "i knew it! i knew it!"

this silly billy incident brought me back right to the first day of school. when i was again, heading towards the wrong classroom, and thankfully bumped into Huiwei and Clara who told me i was wrong.

Clara's speech topic: what are the characteristics of a true friend? or somewhere along that line. have been pondering over 'friends' and i decided the influence of friends can be quite great. or, great. take a step back and think about it.. actually we really spend a good amount of time with our friends and that's, much time withdrawn from your life. with who and on what activities can thus cause a lot. and honestly, yes. i really am very thankful to God for bringing a bunch of goody woody friends into my life. such that big or small, they still make an impact in their own way. and.. so, i wanna be a good friend too. one who will influence people in the right ways.. not a leader or whatsoever, but a friend.

so! probably, or definitely, making Jesus your good Friend will bring you much much much good influence too eh?

2007-05-13T23:44:00.000+08:00

ha. when i first saw my blog just now, the first thing that occurred to me was "Is anybody home!?"

yeah, now there is.

okay THANKS to the feedbacks that this place is long deserted and isolated; i've decided to come update. i haven't been updating.. reason being

#1 my life was probably pretty mundane (during the exam period) and thus, posts wouldn't be news worthy. then again.. it wasn't all that a boring cycle i guess.

#2 there are too many things that they would be all scattered around and hence... hmm.

alright Mothers' Day today! accidentally, i received this message from some foreign number which obviously, was sent wrongly. this is verbatim okay!

"A mom is GODS love in action. She looks with her heart and feels with her eyes. A mom is the bank where her children deposits all their worries and hurt.Amom is the cement that keeps her family together and her love lasts a lifetime. Send this to a gd mpm.U r one of the gd mum!!Happy Mother's Day"

haha, joker. thanks, DAUGHTER -.- but actually, that's a pretty sweet message eh? IF i were his/her mum i would've melted like snow. cos my daughter/son's hot! plus, have good literary skills (although that, apparently, was a forwarded message). ha, joking..

very true.. The Great Commission has no deadline.

good and bad. well, well.

2007-04-28T22:32:00.000+08:00

Disclaimer: The verse below just acts an a motivation for Joanne Lee, it does NOT exist at all.

"By faith Joanne Lee and Co. made it for the Y-Hope church camp in June 2007."

-Hebrews 11:1111

STOP. tell me i cannot go and my God will show you what He can do.

3 more weeks to the end of Early Bird registration,

4 more weeks to the next deadline (HA! deadling ohmygosh)

and yes, i'm getting anxious.. :(

Show me Your Glory.

i thought and imagined something very disgusting today =/ i was looking at different people and wondering how do UV rays make our skin colour different. some pigment thing? and what's worse was that as i was thinking about the lyrics of 'Lord I Live by Your Word'.. hurhurhur =x i got kinda freaked out by the idea of really being a tree and having leaves. it reminds me of some Goosebumps plant monster thing. gosh! God i thank You for not creating us to look like, TREES. imagine imagine, we had chlorophyll and can photosynthesis; we need not buy food to eat anymore. or eeeeee, instead of having the human digestive system, we get the plant system with all the stoma, spongy mesophyll and whatnot, we depend on sunlight etc to make food. oh yuck yuck yuck! ok, i shouldnt entertain such disgusting thoughts!

was bad; i don't want!

and oh well, i'll stick to and be faithful with what i have, where i am, why i do. nevertheless, there is still a tinge of... xxx.

ah, probably this is precisely when 'No turning back' comes in.

paradox, paradox :(

and, i lost my wallet. best news of the year..! i figured out i dont really like having to rmb common daily things. and after that incident, i live in a perpetual feeling and worry that i am forgetting something. which is, annoying.

2007-04-20T23:20:00.000+08:00

gosh! i dreamt of something else even more.. funny bunny. probably school and homework, assignments etc are getting into me. that i dreamt of The Cosine Rule. =x why on earth did i ever dream of such a thing! i even remember in my dream, i saw that very page of my Emath textbook that read 'The Cosine Rule', seriously.

and sometimes i really wonder why can't i keep still and not laugh, at the proper moment, that is. i had my Chinese oral today. and goodness.. Hazel, i then was the one who broke out in laughter in the end! my topic was about the relationship between an owner and maid. and my teacher asked, if such a relationship was broken and had frictions, whose position is it to initiate to mend. and so i was brought to think about the clapping hand analogy; that it takes two hands to clap. little did i know, i somehow thought it was funny and so started laughing i almost couldnt stop until my teacher asked me what i am talking about. big actions, i know i had while i was speaking.. my teacher told me not to move so much in an examination, in the future =/ apparently, my friends saw and were laughing at me. even my teacher, laughed at me after i left! why.

i'm feeling much, much happier than i should be right now. but probably that's cos i've learnt a precious lesson today :) not so much of a i'm-cold-and-deadpan, or insensitive thing. and the lesson was.. a lesson so heartwarming. in the sense that, i was taught by truth how it is to have a loving and un-condemning and un-judgmental (if there are such words) team. how good and assuring it is, to know we're not alone. in good or bad, i'm not alone at all (other than God's so faithful and available company). practically, people around you. i'm glad i'm in this together with.. the pillars! and everyone else as well :)

Hannah, you'll still remain Hannah Banana no matter what. know that you've still Joanne _____ to support and root for you all the way! what's an armour bearer for, right!? plus what's more, Joanne Lee, HA.

i'm unhappy at the amount of assignments and homework i have. IT'S CRAZY :( God, expand my hands to do more! and discipline, actually.

speaking of which! i thought like i wanted to ask (or i wished) that God give me an extra pair of hands. i could turn off the house lights in a snap! but then again, i'll look like a monster = people will shoot weird stares at me = i gotta learn to be secure. ha! Angela, sounds familiar?? ho.

2007-04-15T14:30:00.000+08:00

i think dreams, sometimes or most of the time actually, are pretty silly. i would say mine are too, HA. i woke up today (other than realising to my horror and guilt that i slept through the time which was planned for planning), i also recalled my dreams, though not very accurately.

alright, first i dreamt that the camp dates were changed! in the end, we were all able to go for both camps. haha, and i was so happy that i cried (it's a DREAM). but of course, best if it could be reality at the end of the day.

unfortunately, i dreamt of bad news too. that, (i think) Central C's CG stats dropped from 180 to 82. how in the world would CC have 180 for CG in the first place! dreams would be dreams, really.

then.. Trina Ribena! i dreamt of you SMOKING eh! shocking eh? hur, feel free to come to me for help ok! anytime i'll be there for you. just don't resort to such methods to kill troubles. joking! my dear sheep, i trust that you will not do this to yourself la, haha. after all, it's a DREAM only..

GREAT! ytd's service was.. hurhur, God and i knows what. oh wait i realised, i can testify for the fact that bringing an expectant heart, and God really DOES feed to it. why!

cos i rmb as i was doing up the P&W lyrics slides, i was thinking to myself that now that i know what are the songs already, it wouldn't be as surprising that probably a song or something that God may speak to me. as in, it wouldnt be considered quite as divine anymore, provided there's a word prophesied or sth. so.. i prayed i will still be able to receive something from God anyhow. who knows! i thank God i didnt do the sermon slides, it came all so timely. and hit the nail on the head. ouch! talked about fears and etc during the week, and here's my reply from God. well, well, well.. i know i know, theoretically, that if God is for me, who can be against me. it could be i havent experienced, really, the kinda courage in knowing God's with me.. :( then, maybe i should see such things coming, and be prepared. honestly, overcoming my fears is a big challenge to me. but by God's Grace i can do it, eh? we'll see.. but God, not in the areas of the greatest fears of my life, YET. please.. =x

i was just wondering, is it harder to believe God in the physical things, or the spiritual things? or vice versa? like for example, you're scared of a dog and you believe strongly that God is with you, so the dog will not do anything to you. but the dog may be a fierce and vicious dog, or a nice and tame dog. we'll take it fierce and vicious then. is it easy to bring yourself to believe? or.. in mental/spiritual sense like, hm.. hur, ghosts? you're scared, in the same way, but believing that God's with you.. and you're not scared?

alright, i think im kinda confused and think im not making much sense here. probably it's subjective. or it could be that it's gotta do with our dependence on God?

here's a quote i kinda like: A day hemmed with prayer is less likely to unravel.

makes sense? yes, to me.

This suspense is killing me.

2007-04-08T14:40:00.000+08:00

i was observing the ants travelling in a single file. and i realised that everytime 2 ants crawl past (do they crawl? or walk?) each other, they will stop and 'kiss hi'. most of the time they meet different ants, they will do that. so cute, haha.

2007-04-07T22:59:00.000+08:00

let's recall! Good Friday was.. well spent, in a way. but, i'm sorry pillars! :( i'll promise to make it for the next outing/bday thing. if.. i'm booked early curly =/

and man man man, i figured out that the more i go through, the more i realise how much much much i really needa grow myself in.

#1 I need courage, big time!
#2 More courage etc. God!!! :(

aiya anyhow.
actually i dont really know what to post about. when i feel like it.
Breakthroughs?

c'mon, get the ball rolling friend.

ah, i did give my best :)

i suddenly recalled a joke (TO ME) during shpding some time ago. Hannah did not intend for it to be a joke, but it was really funny.

Did you know? King David worshipped and danced for God until his pants dropped! HAHA

okay sorry Mr David, but that was.. funny bunny =/

2007-04-03T21:38:00.000+08:00

I've learnt 'What's best'.

God, such a situation is beyond my expectation and i don't want it this way. but since it's the best of both worlds.. then so be it. Not my will but Yours be done eh?

The last in a long period and i'll give it my best shot.

2007-04-01T16:17:00.000+08:00

i've been having many little thoughts run through my mine lately i think they're tired now. okay i will share them

#1 It's a wonder how LTTE still survives to this day. killed so many people etc and no one's doing anything.. which is very scary. and if the bombing and killing persists.. God knows what will happen to the world. then i decided i really dont wanna take God's love for granted (not that i have), but i wanna cherish it much more than ever.

#2 It's amazing how God created us all so specific and precise etc. for every microvilli to aid in the smallest way they can, just look at those small things! that's why i love Bio :) how else, can anyone or anything make us the way we are.

#3 Man, the announcement about saving for camp is shown already. and there's still no news about any change in camp or OBS. i've made up my mind, big time, that even if everyone else should stop believing, i will still trust in God.

i think im getting better at solving riddles! yesterday after i got the gist of the first riddle, i was correct for the rest :) but but but, why not at solving Math problems..

my mum ought to bang herself on the wall!!

Mum: eh joanne! there's a cockroach underneath your chair!

Me: (heart skipped 1001 steps, half believing and stares at her dumbfounded)

Mum: haha April Fools'! (laughs away happily)

Sheesh. what a mum!

2007-03-28T21:28:00.000+08:00

feeling down? let me tell you a funny story haha. here goes..

once upon ten times there lived two extremely, very, super, ultra (whatever vocabulary you use to describe them, you name it, they are it) good friends. one's called Sadness, the other, Joy. Sadness, as her name suggests, is almost living in unhappiness everyday of her life and therefore, whenever she had happy happenings in her life, Joy would be the first she would turn to. one fine day, she met with uncountable things that made her really really downcast. but as she was walking on the road with her head down, she spotted the biggest bill the world has ever produced - a 88888 dollar note. she was overjoyed with her unexpected finding and was seen to be a crazy thing bouncing and jumping all around, shouting for joy.

Sadness: Joy! Joy! :D

haha i hope you got the joke. i somehow came up with it and please, even if it's not funny, show the least bit of appreciation. my dream of wanting to become a comedian is not a floormat, please do not step on it! then again, i could just stand there and some jokers would probably start laughing already.. is that how a standup comedian works? hmm

2007-03-27T22:16:00.000+08:00

talked about classroom cleanliness today, i recalled today that i used to be very hardworking in sweeping the floor last year. as such, i was voted to be the aesthetics leader for the class. i remember i get very pressurized whenever teachers or anyone else feedbacked that the classroom was dirty. then one fine day, we received the Cleanest Classroom Award haha! i was very happy that day and felt satisfaction because i kinda worked for it. and had the certificate pinned up proudly on the board (but you know what, they actually allowed it to us for only a week or so. thus i had to have it removed in the end -.-). i was happy, really.

then i likened this to serving God in my lifetime. let's say.. God would be the One feedbacking or questioning me what have i been doing for His Kingdom (my classroom) as a leader, or simply, child of God. and once i'm "threatened" by that, i start working again and finally, will be entitled to my riches in Heaven :)

my lifelong service to God as compared to one year (or less) as an aesthetics leader in the class..

riches in Heaven for as long as eternity is, compared to that cheapskate one week (or so) certificate..

i guess ultimately, i would still choose to serve God. recently i was reminded, that it is really a privilege to be serving in this KOG.

2007-03-24T00:47:00.000+08:00

My dear shepherd, Hannah/(Banana!)

let's see.. it's been quite some time since you've taken me over from Stef. i wanna present to you a big fat thank you for being there when i felt especially stressed, frustrated, caught up & tied down etc. i remember during my common test period, i complained to you how awful i was feeling, accompanied with all that whining, moaning and groaning etc. but you were still patient and oh man! remember also when i was so upset by the things at home? yeah that was bad. even though you couldn't exactly comprehend the way i felt at that tough point of time, you did all you can and well, prayed for me through the msg. and you know what? that made me cry all the more, (but that's cos i was touched ya). i mean, the fact that you put in the effort to try to understand my plight.. :) and heehee you know your affirmation for me on my birthday, it was kinda really hit the nail on the head. which shows.. apparently you are pretty observant about your good sheep huh! hm hmm hmmm, now i understand how you feel like it when you hafta exemplify but yet etc so, i must say you've really did what you could and actually i think you've done it! which is goody woody :) i guess one of the ways you're trying to now is to always see Inez off huh? thank you. i suppose you know how is it like to relate with her and yup, i know you're trying your best to be her friend :) plus now even when you're busy as a bee, you never fail to make time for your 4 sheep! like after your horrible training, you still came to meet me. again, thanks pal! oh and you know what? you've showed me going the extra mile too.. from how to travelled from Woodlands to town to meet Lou, and back to Yew Tee again. and that was after tiring school day too. actually i think there are other things that i wanna say but ho, that'll be left for the card i guess. by the way, please also take care of your health and turn in early whenever you can. i dont wanna a sick shepherd eh!

(PS. You know this was meant to be posted during the Shepherd's Appreciation Week? but i was kinda lazy daisy to think and left it as a draft until now, haha.)

2007-03-20T20:55:00.000+08:00

i figured out (okay, actually i knew it all along) that i haven't updated in a long, long, long time.. that explains why i'm here again.

my March holidays was.. pretty eventful. going back to school for this film production course, which, our work that was produced at the end of the day was = anyhow. due to the time constraint, and our 'anyhow attitude' (which isn't good!) but ultimately, i got to use Adobe Premiere Pro for the first time in my life. hmmm

then there was Metamorphosis which was hm hmm.. okay and not.
BIG FAT THANK YOUs TO THOSE WHO TEXTED, WISHED, CELEBRATED ETC ON MY BIRTHDAY!! :D although i didn't reply your messages, i must say you guys made my day. or rather, week :) and you know who you are = i don't hafta type out, right? i made birthday commitments to God. and i decided that even though i'm growing older (though still young =/), i wanna remain child-like. not as in childish child-likeness, but child-likeness towards the things of God etc. and thankfully, i think i still am. considering my reaction towards certain issues etc. which, IS good :) to the pillars, your affirmations spurred me on and convicted me again, of my commitment. eh.. pray you'll see me at the end of this race!

attended QTLM on Sunday and man, my very first proper attempt of playing crazy bar chords song. didn't turn out as well (as in my playing) as i've expected. okay, actually i didn't expect much but i just didn't think my fingers would be so tired i could hardly press properly. oh well, at least i've tried. and you know what? i guess, i NEED TO improve someway, somehow, big time. anybody interested to shou wo wei tu? heh. should be the other way round. AND, i'm wow at the thought of what may happen in the future. like... you-know-what. with Joanne Lee = no more generation gap! i hope. okay okay, yeah Joanne Lee can do it! :D Jiayi! i miss Peanut! :(

guess that's about all so far that i wanna say.. = gotta run!

2007-02-27T22:19:00.000+08:00

haha i'm back! Melody helped me retrieve my account and password, someway, somehow. pro or pro? thanks a lot! i'm still very amazed at how she managed to do that! why couldn't I!? oh well. look! you're not that what-you-think-you-are after all!

and... common tests are over over OVER!!! im very happy you know why?

#1 i've studied my best for them

#2 i've tried to do them well

#3 i know God'll be pleased :)

#4 so i'm quite assured

although.. the results may not be very good. actually i dont know why i act as though this is the first common test i've done. never mind, never mind. i missed WAM vision night :(

and so... i have relatively more time now for things. but it seems other people are still rather busy.. OH! WE HAD CAREGROUP! and it was very fun! man. it's really a crazy laughter-filled cg today :) and many pictures taken too (for you-know-what)! i'm really glad to see that actually all (or most) of us are enjoying one another's company. therefore, i cannot wait for the next cg! and we'll do sth more interesting, memorable, enjoyable and whatnot :D

and and and, i cannot wait for Metamorphosis (i mean really, not hinting anything haha). i know what'll be the present already (or part of) i'll pray and i hope it'll be given to me. i'm sure it'll be another great experience. really sure.

this period of time was rather.. tough. but part of the load's off, and i feel liberated. hmmm, i'm quite ready (i hope) for what's gonna come. thanks Hannah, for the encouragements :) they made me feel much more comforted. i've grown :)

i figured.. decision-making's hard for me at times. it's when both situations ought to advance the Kingdom. but you hafta choose either one cos it may be hard to compromise. i don't really wanna make one party feel.. stressed or whatever, to add to their load. so it's like, a dilemma. hmmm whatever.

okay and i'm happy again cos my blog's back! :) cya!

2007-02-17T23:10:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D

new year's here already, that's rather fast. had reunion dinner earlier on, and i had a considerably a good time at my grandma's. my aunt's such a joker, or rather, she's such a joke! hmmm.. i wonder what could come out from this new year (other than ang baos). honestly, to me, connecting with my relatives is such a big challenge! i remember most of the time during new years, my sister and i would hide in the kitchen. cos we're afraid of seeing the people and having them talk or discuss about us. i dont know about my sis, but that's what i feel. i am shy :x plus, i am really frightened when people people people look at me! sooo..... okay, we'll see how things go tmr.

sometimes problems are evitable, aren't they? like, fleeing from temptation, you know? i don't see why if such things are avoidable and that i have avoided, i'm said to have no problems. okay actually, i think i'm not making a lot of sense here. my point being.. flee from temptations, and that would probably lessen your trouble load. i realised, it's that important to stand firm in God's Word, especially.. in the midst of negative situations.

and i figured.. availability's really key (one of, at least) in serving God. how much proper and not in-hiding kind of time do i have to offer? quantity time.. can it be short quality time? hmmm... just wondering and wondering.

and Hannah, it's alright. it'll be good to have such comments anyway.

#1 to improve

#2 to be able to take such things

don't worry ya!

2007-02-12T21:10:00.000+08:00

i heard from Hazel that her friend from Northeast is very inspired and encouraged by Crescent's growth today. and i was very encouraged that he was encouraged. THUS, i was very convicted again about seeing more growth in all aspects (er, as many as possible? how many are there anyway..) yup! GO CRESCENT! the breakthrough and victory belongs to us!

and to all who are missing out on this exciting journey.. i pray you'll regret and come back (hey this rhymes! i've got natural poetry talent haha)! :D AMEN.

2007-02-10T22:28:00.000+08:00

i am rather tired now.. pondered over a lot of things on my way home and just a few mins ago.

when i asked Hannah how was service, the first thing she commented was that the sermon lights was so dim she almost fell asleep. and Esther agreed with her as well. during evaluation, the media people observed both the good and bad. i realised there really could be a chain reaction, which means our roles are rather inter-linked! and while discussing, it dawned on me how mistakes can be so easily spotted, but not so for the good points =/ but then again, i'm really thankful for those who are able to appreciate the lights (although actually i don't know what's good about it). thank you, you guys made my day :) even a simple thumbs-up would do. which brings me to say, i wanna see one from God too! (again and again, i figured out i gotta learn from my mistakes anyway) but i wanna encourage myself too, heh. i think i did relatively well, considering it's the first drama i did plus the last minute change of songs :D *pats* make myself happier la huh.

and praise God! we had 3 converts today (i think). and i'm really sorry, i wasn't with you people i didn't even see your shadow at all.. but oh well, i guess soon! i pray and hope they'll be retained. guess they're part of the fruits of our labour huh :)

2007-02-09T20:47:00.000+08:00

back to revive my blog again! i realise people are starting to get stressed up and busy with school activities.. plus, even more so cos last year's sec 4s did well (i heard) = more pressure on the upcoming batch. actually i don't think i'm coping very well either :x but i guess that what i really hafta grow in. the week was.. full of ups and downs i guess. sleepless nights (people have been commenting i look tired everytime i go to school), media meeting and rehearsal (which were fruitful), tests (not that bad actually) and trngs which were not too bad (except i fell today, ouch)! but there were definitely things to rejoice over :)

i'm on duty for both services tomorrow! exciting, huh? that's what i'm really looking forward to. i wonder what could come out from the service. anyway just something random, i figured out that actually i do have many ideas in mind, but it's cos sometimes i cant seem to be able to carry them out on time. so.. i hafta practice and try them out!

watch out for the power of Joanne Lee! :D

2007-01-31T21:12:00.000+08:00

blessed week despite busy school :)

#1 had fruitful caregroup!

#2 after cg, i managed to have shpding with Jessie. though what we did was impromptu, i'm glad she shared relatively a lot. plus, i've learnt a lot through her life as well!

#3 met my twins today, and we made a pact together. pray that it will be useful and we will be faithful in it together..

#4 she's coming back! :D that's the best news i heard during training today!

throughout the whole week i thought about many things. and great! i have many ideas/plans that i really want to carry out, just that i really need time.. actually school's not bad after all. just needa plan time well and well and well. okay i'm really tired now, just wanted to share my joy :D

but wait, i figured out i haven't been replying tags for very long, and that's lazy :x but i've read them, thanks for tagging! you guys bring life to this blog even though i may not update often :)

2007-01-25T18:14:00.000+08:00

hey! i'm a happy girl now cos i've had my speech thingy over and done with! :) note the joy in my words?

my teacher came late. before she reached i was praying for courage, comfort etc. and i even prayed that she will have a stomachache or what so she would not come. :x man, was i scared out of my wits when i saw her..! when i went to the front of the classroom, i saw many pairs of eyes looking at me and that is precisely what i fear - lots of people looking at me. in the end i shared (about how my life changed after being a christian..) but i left out certain details though :( i guess it went quite well cos i fearlessly talked about the church! well i'm proud of that, at least i wasn't discreet or anything indirect. at the end i went back to my seat and my teacher asked me which church do i attend, so i told her! :) later on the way to the chem lab, i met her and she said she is impressed by my speech! but i don't know why either, hm..

all in all i'm relieved and feeling accomplished. i do hope what i shared will interest my classmates and soon i'll find them coming up to me and asking more. by then, i'll be more than willing to share again! (cos it's personally and not to the whole class of people).

and i think it's very interesting cos Crescent's picking up the outreach momentum. i heard Celeste and Sarah actually went to the front of their classroom and invited the people (reason being, Celeste is performing). i must say it's very courageous of them and as a result, they reaped a few contacts! great job! and keep going too, haha then we'll see our 40 soon and very soon! and pray that they'll be retained and remain in the Kingdom of God happily ever after :)

2007-01-19T17:17:00.000+08:00

the ultimate day of the week! all that had happened were so divine.. (the happenings in order of their timeline). this may be a rather long and "story" post. but to me, it's worth the reading :)

back then in the December Esprit De Corps camp's praise & worship concert a year ago (or was it the Encounter camp? then again, i think it's really the Encounter camp), we were all wearing our Crescent PE t-shirt cos the colour code was yellow. and out of the "yellow", we saw an Indian girl wearing our pe t-shirt as well! me being very curious went to ask her why, and was told that she was an ex-Crescentian. from then on, we were quite acquaintances and she wanted to hand over her sister (who's currently in Crescent) so that we could work on her. i remember Pras (the ex-Crescentian) invited her sister for service but her sister didn't come cos she was overseas. after that, Pras and us didn't really contact each other. wondering why i mentioned this? it's not random, later you'll know :)

this morning, i was thinking about my duty on the last ESS of the three EX-cube services. it occurred to me that i'm put to do duty on the LAST one, that is, when my group would most probably be chiong-ing like crazy. then i decided that i want to chiong with them and be with the group on the last service, so i texted Jiayi to ask if she could swap my duty to the previous week. but sadly (not very sadly but just, ya) the reply was no, cos it was a late request. so i accepted that and decided that i will give my best anyway. with the long break that i have before my next duty, make full use of it and chiong whatever i can with the group. and i thought that probably this is God's plan, and He will not shortchange me, that something good will come out of my service.

just after i've made up my mind, guess what! it was recess! (haha no. it was, but that's not my point). after i questioned Miss Ho about my math questions and walking back to my seat, i spotted Narmatha (my classmate) holding on to the EX-cube invitation card. both Shi Min and her were saying that it is very nice. i told her i have as well, asked her if she wants and she said "ya i want, very nice!" this brings me to narrate our conversation (of course the conversation typed isn't verbatim, but the essence is still there, for as accurate as i can recall).

Narmatha: there's a lot of your church people in Crescent is it?

Me: er ya quite, got 24.

Narmatha: in our class so many?

Me: no in our class got 6. (naming them out.. i was so silly i named 6 but counted 5 -.-) the rest are in other classes.

Narmatha: oh.. i almost went to this church last time.
Me: why "almost"?

Narmatha: my sister invited me but i didn't want to go.
Me: huh! who's your sister?

Narmatha: she's an ex-Crescentian, don't think you will know her.
Me: (it suddenly hit me that her sister could be Pras!) huh don't tell me.. her name starts with 'P' is it?...
Narmatha: *nods head*

Me: Pras?!?

Narmatha: ya!!

and there i was in the classroom, jumping with joy and fascination that this world is small, small, small. who would have thought that the sister whom Pras mentioned a long time ago (so long actually i forgot =/) is actually Narmatha who's my classmate now and have been sitting in front of me all along!!! they are worlds apart man. their looks differ, names don't link quite obviously... man! and so i asked Narmatha if this time she wants to come and she said "ya okay okay i will come"!!!!! and so i happily jumped and gave her one of the invitation cards :D i was so happy i couldn't stop smiling and jumping and laughing to myself. what a great blessing to spice up my day!

now i know God really never shortchanges. just when i've decided to want to commit to serve His Kingdom, God blessed me with a new contact. what could be better than an unexpected contact! anyway, thanks to the team who made the invitation cards so nice that they attracted the non-believers; great great job! then this made me think, who knows my lights could be good too (on the last ESS) that the non-believers see and are attracted! heehee :)

and by the way, i had quite a good informal shepherding time with my twins today. Tania commented and Trina agreed that even though it was informal shpding, they learnt something through our conversation. and that really good! and Jessie chose to let out her frustrations/worries to me that day! i am very glad that i could be of help, and that she chose to come to me :)

this week passed fast and great. i think probably cos i looked to it with a more cheerful heart and understood why do i do what i do. committing extra time on after school activities.. i didn't dread training just as much.. great job Joanne Lee!

thank You, God! for ending my weekdays with such huge and i-don't-know-how-to-describe blessings and lessons learnt :) just one Word from You never fails to make my day. i'm once again assured that my commitment towards the things of Your Kingdom will not, and never go to waste.

2007-01-16T20:38:00.000+08:00

And through the storm,

yet I will praise You

Despite it all,

yet I will sing

Through good or bad,

yet I will worship

hi i'm back! let's see.. yesterday was a rather eventful day i suppose. went for WAM vision night (it's after the longest day of lessons plus training okay!) thank God i didn't miss it. okay i admit and repent for not going for the past few ones (given the timing plus day of the week). but now i wanna be faithful in going for it (for as often and long as i can). and man, the new coach came in yesterday also. well, he spoke to us and that made me rather passionate (or convicted?) about training well for as long as i'm in track (if i can, that is). workout wasn't too bad, YET. however, however, i know it's gonna be hard core training from now on :( kill me! honestly if i were given a choice, i wouldn't wanna commit myself for such things anymore.. it's really, time consuming.

oh haha i wanna add that bio lab lessons are interesting! or rather, yesterday's one was. happening monday! Tania and i were having with using the microscope! i remember i didn't enjoy using the microscope back then in primary school. i felt that it was boring and.. boring. we were supposed to observe the hydrilla and onion cells under the microscope, but we finished earlier and so asked our teacher if we could examine other things. she suggested our hair! so the enthusiastic us cut a little of our hair and put it to observation. plus, we observed a bit of paper and dead skin cell =/ it's very fascinating to see the cells and all the wonders in the little thingy! then again, just like admiring the scenery, i'm once again awed by God's creations :)

a little encouragement for myself for what is going on..

keep going, Joanne Lee! :D

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

2007-01-10T21:26:00.000+08:00

okay i really wanna share this interesting (but scary idea that came across my mind this morning). i woke up and don't know why i started thinking about the English oral presentation. basically, it's just going to the front of my class during each English lessons (one person per period) and talk about anything under the sun for 3 mins. current affairs, your likes or dislikes etc. i thought about how Hazel shared that she treasures her cg (and soccer but that's not my point). i was very encouraged and wanted to do something as well. of course, how could i not right? i intended to speak about my lights ministry, cos it's something about the church and not directly about God. know why i chose to be discreet in my speech?

#1 actually i'm scared of speaking to so many people while they're all looking at me =/

#2 with that, let alone mentioning a God that people may discriminate or criticize me for whatsoever.

but this morning, i think (probably i was sleepy or forgot) that God challenged me to share a testimony. man! that frightened and shocked me like crazy. whatever descriptions you can name of fear, i felt it. i thought about it through and through, thinking if that would be an appropriate topic to talk about.. what could the response of the class be like.. and so on. then again, my teacher said anything under the sun right? a testimony is too what. but but but, that would really take a lot of me :( and i'm ultra super duper afraid of this decision that i've made; i will go for it. just whack, right? I AM SCARED. how, how, how?!? encouragements, anyone? that's the best you could give right now.. :(

and then again, i thought of some dreamy (okay maybe it will turn out reality, who knows?) that people will be encouraged, and come up to me and ask me about God hahaha. that would be great! and then i will be even more convicted that God really really doesn't shortchange. ;)

and you know what? i've even thought of how i could use the opportunity to share Christ, haha okay it may sound silly but that's interesting what right. it's to tell that Huiwei drew the bridge diagram for me, and how i ended up who i am (this is part of what i thought of to say haha). and with that, i will whip out the whiteboard marker and draw it on the whiteboard. imagine that? yeah i can, but is that workable..?

MAN MAN MAN, it's really scary..... but i wanna do it for God as well.. BUT honestly, i am scared of this kind of things. and if i do, how much will that please God? :'( :x :) :( ???

2007-01-09T22:04:00.000+08:00

hello, i'm back after school has started. i guess school's.. school, hur. what can i say? but it's horrible returning home and feeling all tired and sleepy. okay i admit, i did fall asleep in class =/ but that was uncontrollable, i didn't want to either. it's back to even more packed up schedules and thanks, trainings are robbing me of a lot of time. it's hard to meet up with my shepherd on a weekday, let alone meeting sheep (the plural of sheep is still sheep, right?) i don't have much time to be able to manage well anyway. soon, even cg may be affected by mock exams huh. what could be better..?

and man, it's scary how people change, not for better is what i'm referring to. it's unexpected, totally unexpected and shocking. we serve the world not because they deserve it, but because God did it for us. you said you wouldn't give up cos God didn't give up on you either. do you care about the people anymore? okay great, i can't help but feel the way xxx did. to think i've encouraged that way, and now it's my turn. but then again, no! how could i think that way? just during worship today, i told God we'll trust in Him for what's going to happen this year. and i will.

it's one thing to serve when things go well, it is another to be faithful during a crisis. faithfulness is tested when life is hard.

oh btw, i haven't made any new sec one friends! :( okay i will, i will. just on friday during the CCA day. someway, somehow, i must and will. Lee can do it!

but even through all that, i must say God has blessed me a lot despite everything's that in school. thank God for good company in my new class that we are able to influence our dear new friend, Serene! it's a rather long story, but i wanna share a bit! Serene's a really comical person haha. sometimes it's just funny to look at her and listen to her talking (okay maybe not all the time of course). she's the only non-believer in the group of us now, and during recess or lunch when we say grace, she'll wait for all of us and say it with us. respect or interest, it's still nice of her :) okay conclusion, i wanna see her in church soon!

2007-01-02T21:51:00.000+08:00

alright, this is the best; school's starting again tmr after a long, long break. honestly, i'm not looking forward to it at all. considering each week will be packed with longer lesson hours, caregroup, meeting sheep and trainings.. but what's to come will come after all. i just pray God will sustain me throughout the year. okay, i ought to repent for not finishing my holiday homework =/ now i know for sure i really dont like myself being like this, so i made a promise to myself and God that i must finish my holiday homework in the future. & i mean this big time. i gotta find ways to keep myself on track, asking kind souls out to chiong with me. i pray God will keep me strong in my promise this time. kill me if i fail to do so (okay, not kill but, hur). okay and i wanna drag myself to be thick-skinned to initiate friendships with the new sec ones. someway, somehow, i wanna know them within the early period of the year. and my goal was to see at least 1 Crescentian coming to know God through me. who will be retained, who will be stable and committed. that one soul, where are you?

this year many things will happen.. changes & challenges. i wonder if my life will be as it is - going smoothly. well i gotta put this deep down in my heart that i will flee from temptation. whatever it is, i want to stand firm in the Word of God. and Joanne Lee can do it! :)

i think im gonna say bye to the internet world for now.. do pray for me! heehee.

why am i scared..? =/ new class = new people = dont know how they will be like..

2006-12-31T00:32:00.000+08:00

well, i decided to breathe life into my blog after a long time, hur. and so, here i am!

what was the most happening (for all i can remember) is of course my media retreat! i must really say thank God is so, so good. last week we decided that it will probably rain during our retreat at Sentosa, as we all know it's the rainy season.. therefore Jiayi, Joseph and I prayed from then on that it will not rain. thankfully, God blessed us with a super fine weather! so fine that some of us got sunburnt -.- for the first time i'm sunburnt, now im red as a tomato. the games we played were very simple games, but they made us know one another at the basic minimum. certain things came up impromptu, like having a team name.. (the Chicken Team! probably some won't buy the idea of having this team name but hur) or even the quite-successfully-carried-out idea of making sandwiches! say i'm deprived, but it's the first time i've made sandwiches on the beach like having a picnic. plus, the funny concentration :) Chickens won the Dog & Bone! it was really an experience to lead a group of new people, a few whom i have not even met before.. but now i know how important is it to have the support from the people, hm. fun aside, i'm really happy to have talked to Shi Jie during dinner and on the way home, i learnt much and was really encouraged. by how he feels the way i do about our ministry, and that he knows lights quite well even though he's not in lights, plus giving me a suggestion as well which could very well be considered. it is how the media team knows one another's effort and role that we can understand and relate with one another better. in conclusion, retreat was.. retreat, haha. i can't describe.

hm, today's lights was rather disappointing though. i thought of many ideas for each part and prepared, but couldn't realise all of them in the end :( could not catch the songs.. well well, when's there's failures, there's room for changes and improvements haha. my theory, my theory..

okay i hope this won't bore you for those outside the media.. there's really much more to it than it seems.

oh wait, i wanna add that i had my very first shepherding with Hannah today. though we didn't share deep stuff or whatsoever, i learnt a very valuable teaching. which is very fundamental in our walk with God. in short, it's knowing that God is always there. or rather, here wherever you are. this simple statement could very well change our lives, perspective or even actions and speech in our daily lives. i'll try it, just remembering for as often as i can that: God is here.

2006-12-20T22:27:00.000+08:00

let's see, i think friendships really enable me to learn a lot. or rather, good talks are.. aiya. i managed to catch up with Huiwei that day. it was not planned or whatsoever, from deciding to buy some snacks and a drink, we ended up sitting down like the smokers and talk.. =/ well, we both shared deeply and Huiwei told me something that shocked me. when i was at home thinking through, i got scared. therefore i dialled for her home and handphone but she did not pick, leaving me in desperation to find someone to let it out. so i texted my EX shpd Stef and she called me when she reached home. i told her all that i wanted and just managed to clear my thoughts, phew! well i really enjoy talking to her on the phone :) then i went Art Friend shopping with Jiayi yesterday, and i learnt about quite some stuff about certain things too..

okay i won't go into detail about what happened these days, but i must say friends are indeed blessings :)

and somehow i figured out that once we understand the value of something, chances are you will give your best for it, be it big or small.

and so, i am a happy girl writing christmas cards at home. i'm very pleased to announce that i have currently completed 31 cards! they are not just slipshod cards, but cards i took time to think through and write.. i learnt my lesson from last year that..

#1 Making is time-consuming, hence i only wrote on cards which are bought

#2 It's better to prepare things on time, not last minute scribblings.. -.-

i have been very happy while writing the cards (no procrastination nor complains) simly because i figured out that cards may impact people as well! who knows one word could speak a thousand words. haha okay, that's exaggerating =/ so.. i took time to think about what to write although some are not very well written, i'm sorry! but otherwise, i take pride in my cards :)

let's see.. nothing much happened already. going off to write more! :D

2006-12-14T21:56:00.000+08:00

back from camp! it's been a rather short but fruitful camp.

dodgeball was fun when i did not expect it to be, heh. however, cheerleading was rather screwed up due to the songs. but overall, everyone did well even though we had impromptu steps. thanks to Qixin who led us well, and who persevered and gave her best within a short period of time..

we sat through teachings and we were told many inspiring stories by Pastor David Chen (woops i mean brother, but it feels weird!) it made me really encouraged and convicted that God is real and indeed does work miracles. i'm looking forward for God to work miracles in my life as well! i wanna see myself being able to tell such amazing stories! :)

doing the concert lights was scary, but i guess God always calmed me down with a prayer prayed (as always when i'm serving). well it's too bad the effects cannot really be seen cos the people are not elevated unlike being in Nexus. but still, people on the 2nd level and God did!

of course, i learnt many lessons from the camp. for example, encouragement is powerful. at least it applied for me. i must say i feel rather guilty and unhappy i missed out bonding with my group (heard it was good stuff) when i was serving or at rehearsals, but God did not & never shortchanges. i grew closer to the media team and got to do clicking of the lyrics for the first time! clicking may seem simple to people, but it does play an important role as well. imagine, what if we never put up the lyrcis, or the slides stay at the same one? people wouldn't know how to even sing the songs, and certain lines of the lyrics may minister greatly what right.. any part of the body, be it big or small, does play a role. if one part fails to function, the whole body ceases to function well.. am i not right? it's heartening to see Clara learning to give her best in serving as well :)

okay i shall end here, dont wanna make it such a wordy post.

2006-12-05T13:09:00.000+08:00

Happy, happy birthday, Elise!

i'm sorry, i intended to ring you up for an affirmation at twelve midnight but i was too tired. and besides, i had to wake up early for visit to SSS. therefore, i decided to post it up :)

anyway, hm let me recall. i think you're one who always initiates to know our new believers on an intimate level. i remember when i came for my very first service last year, at the old x-box you came up and introduced yourself (haha okay, i'm recalling!) i remember when i was a new believer, i used to talk to you online and flood you with many questions about the church and all that. you weren't irritated, but instead you told me it was a good spirit to be inquisitive! :)

during seed meetings, i guess sometimes we would take quite some time to settle down, keep quiet and pay attention to you. however, you did not lose your rag! and even though central c may be a relatively big group, you never fail to be concerned about each and every one of us. you're very affirmative also (just look at your recent tag!)

i guess i don't really get to spend much time with you though. except for the past few weeks after a meeting we (huiwei, you and myself) would hang out together. oh oh oh! and how you took the effort to meet us up before believers' gathering for a teaching for us. i suppose that's when we got to know you're a fun & relational leader. yep yep.

have a very blessed birthday.

2006-11-29T19:07:00.000+08:00

i hereby declare (after so many years) that i am really sick and tired of travelling! i don't like always having to travel (not that i've ever liked, but now i express my dislike towards it). WHY do i always have to travel like years to reach when everything else is a stone's throw away for people (okay, i'm exaggerating)!? given a choice, i'd rather not want to! >:(

okay fine, i'm done with complaining.. :(

2006-11-24T15:54:00.000+08:00

Stephanie is my shepherd.

(cry when you read this!)

Dear shepherd,

it's been about 16 months after i came in to Hope and therefore, 16 months since you've been my shepherd. let's see.. i remember when you first started shepherding me, i would feel all weird and awkward. and you know what? if i'm not wrong, our first shpding was at KAP, and you taught me "The Habit of Studying God's Word" on 28 August 2005 (the date's cos i went to check haha). and i appreciated you for 2 shepherds appreciation night. the first one, i gave you something almost hand-made, but it was ruined due to the stupid paper bag. second one was one Huiwei and I got to talk a little to you (and that was the last of Huiwei's appreciation for you eh?) but but but, i guess this camp will be the last of mine to you too..

for my birthday, you gave me this Mentos box (with no sweets :O ) but pieces of paper, and yummy cookies! :) i looked through it just now and realised how silly (but touching la okay) you sounded.

"I pledge to do my best to help you grow closer in your walk with God. and I genuinely want our relationship to grow deeper. let's aim to follow God, all the days of our lives! I know I'm not perfect, but I'll do my best to be a good leader to you. heh. love ya!"

yeah, you have. last year, when ShiHan told me she would not come to church again and send you a message that i was upset and all that, you didn't reply me when i was waiting for your reply. instead, you called me (intentional or saving messages, haha). but still, i was touched. and twice out of random, you gave me cards (which i love to receive!).

what's more, i remember we promised to change our fault together. i think i did it! have you?.. and and and, i shared with you about my struggle with low self-esteem through a long letter (i rmb i wrote about seeing a cockroach at my window, right!?) and you talked to me (lazy to write back, huh) and said you did too, and what i struggled with you have been through also. look! now i'm alright already :) see, see? you helped me grow!

oh, then it becomes now during shpdings i wont feel that silent awkwardness already. (rmb the colourful chocolate ring thing we bought?) and we went for Sakae together :) yup yup, i think that was when i felt more comfortable with you. now, even talking over the phone for more than 30 minutes would not be a problem, right? i guess our phone conversations were a good catch up.

not only that! when we discussed about our care group at KAP for shpding that day, remember how convicted we were about seeing those qualities in the group?? you said after your O levels you would 'join forces' with me, but now you're moving on. hm hm hm..

in conclusion, you have been a faithful shepherd (and i think i have been a good sheep to you!). and the way you lead, it's more of trying to be a friend than a leader. good job! you have made it! but i know, you can be serious when appropriate. you would help me with my sheep too. through certain issues, you have taught me going the extra mile for your people. through your life example, you've taught me to be relational as well.

well, that's for all i can remember and say. Go Stef! I love you :) & will miss you too.

2006-11-23T19:18:00.000+08:00

Stef wants to tell me something on Saturday. it's scary cos she sounds serious and insists it must be face-to-face. i hope it wont be something too bad =/

we had combined cg yesterday! because only 4 from cc3a turned up. but we had fun though :D i figured we should include a new role - one who brings snacks! yum.. i also realised that sometimes it's really in your cg that you can afford to be stupid with, people you are comfortable with you can do silly things or act crazy.

and okay, i just received a call from Stef and will be told what she's going to say (haha sounds silly). but yup, and shepherding tmr too! :)

2006-11-20T19:45:00.000+08:00

i'm back again! i was doing my quiet time just now, and i realised something - the camp preparation devotions are mostly taken from the Purpose Driven Life. since my reading of the PDL is slower than the devotional booklet, it serves as a recap for me. which is good actually. because i was then reminded of certain things.

Word equations:

Loving someone = Giving her your time - #1

Giving someone your time = Loving her? - #2

Giving someone your time = Giving someone a portion of your life - #3

okay you know what? i think this lovey dovey thing is running all around my mind, it's time to clear them out.

i dont know what's with me recently, but i have been in a mood for exercising. to be exact, running. actually, i like running for leisure; not training. today's trng was a real work out in a long, long time. and i am going running tmr too. there's no trng on Wednesday, which means i'll have to go running during the week. running date, anybody?

2006-11-19T21:51:00.000+08:00

Sunday mornings are rather boring. since it was so, i took out my guitar and wanted to play. however, it was out of tune. when i looked at Peanut (my guitar) just now i thought, "how annoying.." because now he hardly serves a purpose given that he's out of tune. right after that unwholesome thought, i felt a pinch of guilt. because i only loved Peanut when he was nice and in tune, when i needed him badly. but now, i actually thought he was annoying and useless. sounds rather silly, right? but here's my point.

i guess sometimes we may tend to only love people when they are loveable. otherwise, we may choose to ignore the person's presence, or offer hurtful comments whatsoever. well, that's all the more we should love the person. hopefully at the same time, the person could change to be more loveable. but then again, that lies with why the person is like that eh? it could be the person's personality or character, but they are changeable what. so.. it's a two-way thing. firstly, to love the hard to love (i wont say unloveable, cos all are loveable what. it's a choice to make). secondly, to become someone easier to love (haha).

and something i really dont understand, why why why must people be so emotional! one can appear to be so upset over a blog or an Msn nickname, but when looked at the real person is wah, two different things. why!? express emotions over technology and not reality. weirdos..

2006-11-18T22:56:00.000+08:00

it's Saturday! which means there was service today. speaking of which, i woke up this morning thinking it is Sunday, because the sky seemed like a Sunday sky. Huiwei, Hazel and I shared our testimony today. Hazel and i were so scared our hands were shaking when we went on stage. but after which, i was told by quite a number of people that it was good or they were encouraged/inspired. which brings me to say that being scared was worthwhile, it makes me glad knowing that i am able to encourage people through such a testimony. and it occurred to me that what we do either have an impact/influence on people, or in the spiritual realm.

during altar call, i cried like rain after a drought (reason being, i havent cried in a long time). Shirley talked about winning souls over to the Kingdom of Light, and i guess God reminded me about my family members. especially my sister. she just shared with me ytd night that she was very afraid of death, even thinking about it would make her tremble. however, i could not comprehend how she felt because i already know my future's secured; Heaven and eternity's waiting for me. i felt really burdened for them, and it feels i am so helpless. i recalled last Saturday when i was back home from service, my mum popped me a question: why do you always go to church? well.. that goes without saying, she wouldnt believe and understand why. but thankfully, my sister was rather supportive of my going to church, given that she was in a missionary school and had Christian friends invited her to YHope for a few services, but she was never moved. :( still, she did not discourage me of my going to church but spoke quite well of that. just that, she commented speaking in tongues freaked her out =/ and now Mum's starting to display her disapprovement (if there's such a word) to my commitment. and honestly, it is discouraging, disappointing etc. it starts to worry me as well. but, i'll pray for all the best. probably things are happening in my home shows that God's gonna do something, huh. back to altar call, i was reminded and directed back to the purpose of outreaching, because i love them (my family, friends) i want them to experience what i have, to have their purpose found, eternity secured as well.

as for impacting people through my blog, i dont know about that. if what i share helps..

i thought of sth else too, why be upset when you know God can eventually bring joy into your life. i mean, that's my opinion for now haha. i like people to be happy and joyous!

2006-11-12T11:28:00.000+08:00

it's disappointing when the amount of trust you placed in God turned out to be an un-answered prayer. i went to search for my notebook at Meridien yesterday. Stef and i asked a few cleaners and apparently the drinks store is a 'makeshift' lost&found station, but they did not receive anything like my notebook :( needless to say, i was very upset because..

#1. It's hard to retrieve everything inside because i can't remember what's inside

#2. Replacements are just not as authentic

it's okay, i will not brood over the loss of it any more. but, i'm still waiting for a miracle!

had duty yesterday. i'm not slacking 3/4 of the time! i was letting her try doing on her own, you know.. i was asked this question which i am still pondering over. "What do you want to see in lights?" honestly, even though i was told i done good lights before, i dont know what makes the lightings good. which is, my next step to discover. something random, i cant wait for camp!

2006-11-06T21:31:00.000+08:00

Missing: My white Navy A5-size notebook

Location of disappearance: Meridien Food Court Table (Probably, I'm not sure too)

Time: Just before CLM. That's when I rushed off and forgot about it. How could I?!

Appeal: Return it to me!! I've got precious treasures in it. Money, sermon notes, teachings, plans etc. They are very important, okay?

And pray for it to come back too also, please!

Reward: You could have the money but not anything else. :(

i am starting to develop the habit of reading. honestly, i dont like reading books at all. everytime i pick up a book to read, after some time i tend to fall asleep. but i dont wanna waste my holidays. but reading books like Purpose Driven Life, once i read, i'll learn= i'll grow :) so.. that's my motivation.

went to watch Grudge 2 today for i-dont-know-what reason. it's silly cos i'll end up getting very afraid and requesting for stupid things like asking my dad to wait outside the bathroom while i shower. i dont like being scared of things either. which brings me to say, i have really tried to overcome the fear of stupid horror stuff but it's to no avail. why? i dont know! and when i was reading Purpose Driven Life, it states "You are who you are for a reason". does that include my personality? silence means consent, huh. but then again, perfect love casts out all fear! i've really tried going into the shower alone without my dad at home, but i couldnt bring myself to step in further. what a coward! but then again and again, i need not overcome it, do i? i just have to avoid watching such irritating movies! and otherwise, i would not be afraid of that. you know, physical things like dogs are another case la huh. that's it! i've learnt my lesson and here's my new law (for myself, that is) : never to watch such movies ever, ever again. and i mean it. why scare myself when i could spend my time doing better and meaningful stuff, right? yes.

2006-11-01T19:48:00.000+08:00

cg outing today was fun fun fun! i'm sure the people enjoyed themselves a lot : ) this means a very good sign!

2006-10-30T22:26:00.000+08:00

i'm very proud to announce that my camp form has been authorized! and i'm very happy now :)

2006-10-24T22:21:00.000+08:00

this hit me today: If we do not widen our pool of friends, or step out of our comfort zone to ask, we are depriving them of an opportunity to receive salvation, or even know about it.

2006-10-24T09:00:00.000+08:00

here's what i read from Ministries Today. although i feel it's for leaders of a higher level (like pastors), i'm sure we could use these.

-Our conversation must be absolutely and completely littered with the gospel. Is such conversation offensive? Absolutely! We have become so concerned about not being offensive but being "sensitive" that we have stopped preaching and moved into counselling.

-"Thermostats VS Thermometer" analogy. See yourselves more than cultural "thermometers", people who simply reflect the moral climate of your surroundings. Be "thermostats", people who choose to control the moral climate of your surroundings.

the first quote brings me back to recall about one of the teachings about sharing Christ effectively. Our fear of rejection must not overshadow the people's need to know God. more often than not, i am rather afraid of what people would think of me if i go up to them and share the gospel. because i used to be like them, who would think like is this person trying to pull me into a religion or something? so now we turn the situation around, it's understandable people would think that way of me. but i'm not afraid of rejections (considering i've already had so many) but it's the opinions of the people towards me that hinders me. but whatever it is, i've came up with a week-by-week goal towards hitting about 18 for CC3b, so i'm gonna throw away all these unnecessary thoughts! i've nothing to lose, right? come on, Compassion and Passion work together to boost me into outreaching!

35, here we come!

you're not very far away, are you?

2006-10-21T22:57:00.000+08:00

THE BEST DAY EVER! :) Tania came to receive Christ today during prayer meet as she had to leave early for a family outing. welcome to the family of God! but the sad thing is, she has quite a strong parental objection. (in fact, she was able to come today cos she told her father about going out to celebrate her friend's bday. but it's a white lie! we really did.) but i can really feel her excitement, gratefulness and joy. here's all her messages to me..
1. I just got home. THANK YOU SO SO SO SO MUCH JOANNE! i'm really really happy and touched now.
2. JOANNE! you know what? i'm still very happy. this's like the happiest day of my life. I really really really want to thank you!
3. yeaps. i'm really happy too! today is like the happiest day of my life. but if my dad allows me to go to church every sat, i'll be even happier. i really want to thank you joanne. really.
4. Yes yes! joanne! help me pray too okay? because i really want to go to church too. really! thank you joanne so so so much for not giving up on me, and kept giving me opportunities to know God.
5. YEAH! the first thing i got home was to tell her (Tania's twin sister) that i accepted Christ. And i kept telling her how great my feeling is. yeah! haha, of course i won't give up! yeah! The church is like really nice! really really! joanne! so excited!
6. HAHA! You made me have the happiest day i ever had! by bringing me to church! and allowing me to accept Christ in my life! really!
7. yeah! =) haha, because i'm really happy what! yeaps.

see how simple her desire is to come to church? i feel really excited yet burdened for her, given the fact her father very adamant about not allowing Tania to. so, can i appeal for you to keep her in your prayers constantly? (if you read this, please do so!) i believe like Hazel, Tania will be able to come one day too. please, the best thing you could do for her is to pray for her.

and Tania, do not give up! you've made the best decision ever, so stand firm in it no matter what. you have God's back-up! and haha silly, i didnt allow you to receive Christ, it was your own decision. you allowed it yourself. and i can really feel your sincerity, dont thank me! i'll feel funny, haha.

2006-10-16T18:10:00.000+08:00

yay, i had a great train ride home with Hazel today. and i love train rides home with her when we can talk about things. Hazel, Huiwei, Clara and I were at KFC today, waiting for Celete's dental appointment to end. but it was rather late, so we decided to go home. but i suppose we had fun. er, also scary huh. and i heard of a certain issue which got me rather stumbled and burdened :( but anyway, Hazel are i are new spiritual buddies! heh heh :) oh and the talk with her made me realise that i think rejections after rejections made me rather cynical about my outreaching, thinking that no matter how hard i tried and try, i will never see fruits. but i was inspired by Hazel's story, that YingMin re-dedicated herself to Christ again! welcome to the family, YingMin! :) and i was very convicted before alighting and declared that i will continue to share Christ with XinEr, im not going to stop here! and i mean it. from today onwards, i'm going to use my time to invest in people and more people, and in the group.

2006-10-15T22:18:00.000+08:00

travelled quite a lot today. but i love rides on stranger buses, i like to see the unfamiliar places. i'd like to explore Singapore one day. but it wont work out, considering the fact that i am afraid of missing my destination. or i could just ride on one without a destination. anyway, that's not my point. the main highlight is, Stef and i discussed about our caregroup today and brainstormed certain points about the group, which have to be improved. not only that. for myself, Stef told me how i should, in that sense, change. i know, so after shepherding i decided that it was high time i check, reflect and evaluate about myself or the group as well. given the abundant time i have after the exams (actually not really, cos training's going to resume!) but whatever it takes, im going for it. no more subsets!

2006-10-14T23:59:00.000+08:00

it'a rather late now and im sleepy.. but i still want to share something which i was "yes yes yes!" about today. Daniel suggested caregroups going down during praise and worship, then turn back and look at the people. A glimpse of a glorious church. I can totally identify with that! like i've mentioned a few posts back, the sight of the praise and worship from the MM room is GREAT! really, it's WOW! now i know how to describe that sight already. it's worth the try, even if it's embarrassing youself.
anyway, service was great, as always. and i must say i've learnt a lot today. from the teaching with Elise as well. i like it when i learn a lot haha. and Central vision night was great too! but it's quite sad some of them missed it, they missed out on so much. Be inspired, and perspire.

2006-10-13T19:05:00.000+08:00

rejections, rejections, REJECTIONS! on Tuesday i was so happy, upon hearing my friend agree to coming to church this Saturday, smiling to myself on the train like some retarded person. but today, i received a message from her saying that she's not coming anymore because she's going to celebrate my friend's birthday. what a way to end my Friday! it's sucks getting such last minute rejections. rejections are bad enough, but rejections after false hopes are worse. okay i understand she doesnt put coming to church more important than her friend's birthday. but still, it would hurt a little knowing that she missed this opportunity to receive salvation. in fact, i was quite sure she would receive Christ this time she came. however.. :(

but of course, i wont give up, NEVER. how can i, right? and thanks Hannah for the encouragement, probably God really sent you along the way to cheer me up (given that it's quite sudden you asked me for Peanut, when Ang said you guys may not need him)

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful." -Hebrews 10:23

nevertheless, i will stay hopeful for a miracle to surprise me! right? how can i possibly let stupid STUPID Satan defeat me! no no no. and it's needless to say, i'm still on for 35! :)

what's unswervingly? =/

2006-10-11T17:45:00.000+08:00

i was typing the Spiritual Giftings Assessment on Monday night. and i came across this question which i didnt understand. "I enjoy being the champion of the underdog, always standing up for those who have been labelled as beyond help." (and i spotted a spelling mistake in the paper, i typed 'beyong' help.) but that's not the point. i just felt that, yeah, we should believe in the unexpected people, to see potential in them despite their current weaknesses or problems and what not. which reminds me of what Shirley said during the prayer meet (the one at eleven weekly last time. what's it called? i forgot :( ) Believe the best in your people and they will be their best. makes sense? to me, yes. well, i think that's very true cos it's during experiences that people learn a new lesson. and weaknesses, God will mould them. i wouldnt have been who i am today if my leaders or people did not believe in me in the past.

and while typing the spiritual giftings assessment (it not only trained my typing skills, so many many questions!) but also made me realised that God has grown or even multiplied my spiritual giftings, which, i'm thankful for. so, i want to trust and believe in my people as well!

2006-10-10T21:41:00.000+08:00

God i pray You'll give me strength and courage. We know this has to be dealt with asap, God i hope you'll help me and use me to put across the message. this is something i've never done before, it feels.. weird and scary. but God, i want to be able to tackle this. God, elevate me to let me see things from a higher level, to be able to address to the problem and solve it with them. i dont want to be a leader of no use, but one that can help grow the group. i need Your help, Your anointing, Your wisdom, Your everything.

"Answer me when I call to You,

O my righteous God.

Give me relief from my distress;

be merciful to me and hear my prayer."

-Psalm 4:1"

2006-10-10T19:44:00.000+08:00

One thing: My friend will be coming for service this Saturday!!! :)
Can anyone feel my joy? she's one i've been waiting for to come very long. in fact she came twice, both which took years that she came. but she was very afraid to come alone, therefore bringing 2-3 other friends. but it wasnt very effective, because there were so many people i couldnt get to share with her. and besides, they didnt have altar call. but now with only one Christian friend accompanying her, i'm sure i'll be able to share with her, and pray that she'll come to receive Christ! :)